Played Out

5. Building Up

Pharaoh

I squeeze my pillow tighter snuggling deeper into it trying hard not to wake up yet. My bed felt hella good and I was not trying to wake up. I could hear light snoring which put me on alert.

I open my eyes slightly and realized my arms were wrapped around a body with my head in between two melons for hood, while a leg was wrapped around my waist. I looked up and smirked seeing Essence sleeping peacefully. I decided to enjoy the cuddle session and go back to sleep.

I had only closed my eyes for a few minutes before I felt her waking up. Her hands ended up in my hair massaging my scalp. Before I knew it I let out a moan against her body. And that was all it took for it to wake up. I felt her slightly sit up but I just held her tighter.

"Shit" she whispered "How in the fuck did this happen?"

I held in my laugh but sighed and snuggled her playing sleep even more.

"Pharaoh!" She shook me "Come on shit! Pharaoh wake up!"

I didn't budge.

"Pharaoh wake yo ass up!"

I stayed silent feeling her struggling under me. After a few seconds later I felt something, which had to be her food, caressing my ass. I scrunched my face up until she slit the cheeks with her toe. I jumped out the bed looked around mad as fuck. I rubbed my eyes keeping the idea that I just woke up.

"Damn man stop playing!" I sighed looking at her "Oh shit baby girl how did I miss you taking off ya clothes for daddy?"

"What?"

She looked down and notice she was in a t-shirt and panties that I'm pretty sure was a thong. She yelped before covering up. I shook my head and headed into the bathroom so she could get dressed.

After going through my hygiene routine of face, teeth, and shower, I came back out to a fully dressed Essence. I couldn't help but smirk at her as I went to get dressed in my closet. I threw in boxers, joggers, and a hoodie to keep it simple and quick. When I came out I grab my keys and she followed suit following me out the crib. Thankfully Zucca was sleep and Divine wasn't even there.

I drove Essence home in virtual silence. We pulled up to some nice condos and she sighed before thanking me. I got out the car and walked her to her door, which she rolled her eyes and laughed about.

"Thanks again Pharaoh" she unlocked her door

"Nah thank you" I smirked "You're really easy to talk to you know. Maybe we can keep hanging out and talking"

"Maybe"

"Good. I'll see you around baby girl"

I left Essence place and decided to go see Harmony. Throughout the drive I tried to find the words I would say to her. Harmony was cool as fuck as a person. She was sweet and freaky plus she was gorgeous. The thing is I knew from jump Harmony wasn't the girl for me. She was the perfect fuck buddy but that's it. When we were together it was always about what I wanted. She didn't even really have life goals for herself. I mean she was a great person, just not the one for me. I knew this conversation was going to change the dynamic of our situation.

I parked the car and headed to her apartment trying to calm myself. When I knocked her sister answered and hugged me. Destiny might've been Harmony's twin but she was completely different. She was full of attitude and hella ratchet. She was fucking with Zucca heavy. Really we all had that one fuck that was at the top. Divine had Yonni, Zucca had Destiny, and I had Harmony.

"Where Harm?"

"In bed" she sighed "She just been in a funk"

"You know?"

"Of course"

"You cool with this?"

"I mean it's what Harmony wants. Are you?"

"I think me and her just need to talk more you know. I don't want her to make in rash decisions then be depressed or hate me"

"Trust me Rao, it's not you. This is her choice"

I nodded before heading back to her room. When I walked in, she sat up looking confused. Usually, I never did pop ups on females. I just didn't like that shit. Plus they instantly thought it could be reciprocated and I'd be damned.

"Hey ma" I sat at her desk facing her bed "You good?"

"Yeah... just tired"

"Can we talk?"

"About yesterday"

"Basically" I sighed "I just feel like we didn't really talk this out"

"Okay"

"What's the appointment for?"

"They going to test my blood to confirm that I'm pregnant, tell me how many weeks, then go from there. The nurse I spoke with said I could probably do a same day procedure"

I nodded "And you dead set on getting rid of it?"

"Rao" she put her head in her hand "We're not ready for a baby. We not even together"

"I know that Harm... but I just don't rock with that. I mean it's your body but this is my life too. I don't want to regret not telling you that I d on't think this a good idea"

"So you want me to have this baby?"

I sighed again "I mean... I don't know"

"There is no I don't know Pharaoh! I'm fucking pregnant! This has to be dealt with! I'm not ready to be a mom! I have my whole life ahead of me! I haven't even graduated college! I don't have a fucking job! I can't do this! And you can't either! Your parents have money but we don't! I'm not trying to struggle for the rest of my life trying to raise a baby with you!" she started crying

"Don't you think I know that? I'm not saying I won't support you! Stop crying and shit" I sighed "All I'm saying is this isn't something we should just go with without thinking it through. I'm not no deadbeat ass nigga and you know that! I you don't do it we would figure it out"

"And if I do?"

"I told you, I'll support you decision... but honestly I can't sit there with you through that. I can't go through that whole appointment knowing when we leave it's going to be gone"

"That's not support!" she jumped up "You don't think I'm scared!"

"I know---"

"You don't! Fuck you! My sister can go with me! I don't need shit from you!"

"Man stop" I stood in front of her "You blowing this shit out of proportion! You mad because I don't want to sit there and watch you kill my seed? Like damn! What do you want from me!"

"I want you to be there for me!"

"I am! You want me to pay? I got you! You want to talk after? I'm there! Shit if you want to fuck a week later, you know what's up with me and you" she shook her head "I just want us to be sure man damn. I want you to know for a fact there won't be regrets or bad blood"

She nodded but wouldn't look at me. I pulled her into a hug and kissed her forehead before deciding to leave. I spoke my peace so whatever she does she does. if she does it then I'll just be left to deal with it.