I'm tired of pretending-
I'm tired of hiding,
of running away.
I feel like screaming,
and withering away.
My thoughts are a mess.
I can't tell what's right
or wrong.
I'm not sure what I want.
I'm losing my mind-
no doubt about it.
It's like I can't breathe-
I'm thinking too much,
and it's killing me.
I want to curl into a ball
and cry.
I want to tell you what's wrong.
But I know better.
I'm not that naive.
Would you even understand anyway?
I'd like to think you would.
I just...
I need to be alone for a while.
That's a lie.
Don't listen.
I need someone to talk to.
Not someone who'll just nod their head.
Who would do that though?
I feel alone,
even though I know I'm not.
It makes me angry,
and insecure.
It's too much to bottle up and send away.
It hurts to dream of better days-
they'll never come.
All I can wish for,
is that somehow-
everything will be okay.
I dont' know why I believe that.
I can't grasp the harsh reality
I dwell in-
I don't belong here.
Not with you,
not with them.
Only in the dark-
where there's none of that
heavenly light to blind my way.
And as lost as I am,
I will wander,
I will not stop-
forever a memory-
drifting until I find my way home.
To nowhere I belong.
