It Doesn't Matter (Matter #1)

31. A Single Forbidden Kiss

They all sailed back to the house. All of them were exhausted but something about having fun in a group of people of the same peer made them stay up even later. They landed on the beach and hang there for a while, some of them even had the energy to play beach volley ball in the dark.
They ended up in the water once the ball landed there, it was a fun mess and all of them finally participated, even the ones that were adverse of the ocean before like Ryuu and Malkia.
They had dinner close to midnight so most of them retired to their rooms right afterward.
Ryuu had decided to give Malkia some room so he slept in another room and left her in their room. He had been feeling down the whole day, it was really hard for him not to take out his mood on the people around him but he didn’t want to give her more reasons not to choose him. He felt certain that she was going to have to choose.
He felt stupid now for not thinking about it, he should have known that Luke would see what a great girl she was especially when she kept looking at him with wounded puppy eyes. 
His heart felt heavy and he felt like he was in the hospital waiting room waiting to be told some bad news because it was quite obvious no good news could come of it.
He tossed and turned, he just couldn’t sleep, not when his heart felt like it was slowly breaking into a million pieces.
Malkia was in her room doing basically the same thing until she gave in and decided to go on another walk on the beach. Part of her was hoping to run into Luke so she could ask him what he meant yesterday, another part felt guilty for wanting to pursue that conversation when the answer would likely harm not only Ryuu but Jamila as well.
But what girl didn’t want to be told those three little words by the guy they were in love with?
Luke was right there where he was yesterday, he was facing the ocean and he turned to smile at her as soon as he heard her footsteps.
“Come to keep me company again?” he asked her.
“Something like that,” she said, she didn’t want to do anything she would later regret so she kept standing “I should go,” she said thinking that there was no way she could be around him after she had lied about it to Ryuu. She realized that she should of have thought of that sooner, that she shouldn’t of have come here at all. It was a bad decision on her part, a decision that made her out to be the bad guy.
“Why?” Luke stood and walked towards her, he was closer than he had ever been his eyes were studying hers, following their every movement.
“It’s cold,” she said, she was dressed in one of her sleeping shirts and it was quite breezy tonight.
“Here,” he said placing his hoodie on her after swiftly taking it off, it was black and heavy and it smelled like him. His smell though quite pleasant didn’t seem to have the same effect that Ryuu’s had on her. That was not to say that she wasn’t affected, her heart was beating quite fast and she had completely lost the ability to talk or move. She was looking at his eyes, thinking that they were so clear and that they held her to them especially when they were this close.
He slowly make circular movement around her shoulders after draping her with the hoodie and then moved them to her cheeks, his hands were cold but she felt hot where he touched her. She wasn’t sure if the flush she was feeling was simply her blush or if her body was simply heating up from having him so close.
He looked her squire in the eye, something in them told her that she needed to move away but she couldn’t, not when they looked at her that way, like they were determined and sure, like they were telling her to be the same.
He moved in closer as he was holding her cheeks and he didn’t close his eyes until his lips were right on hers. His lips were soft and they slowly started dancing on top of hers, she felt herself go weak, like all the butterflies in her stomach wanted to get out and they were making her sick.
She wasn’t sure if she had even started to kiss him back when she heard the footsteps behind her. She moved away from him and quickly turned to look at the person that had joined them. It was the last person she wanted to be there.
“Ryuu,” she said his name like a plea and he looked at the both of them with a face so cold Malkia actually shuddered.
He didn’t say a single word to the both of them; he turned and walked back to the house.
“Ryuu!” Malkia called for him, her voice desperate, a voice in her head was telling her that she needed to explain. He needed to know that she had never done that before, that she hadn’t even kissed him back – but she hadn’t pushed him away either, another voice said, she was about to open her mouth right when he showed up.
“Let him go,” Luke said holding her arm.
She turned to look at him, anger flaring now that she saw what his actions led to “Why did you do that?” she yelled at him as she took her hand back with a shrug “is the fact that I have feeling for you amusing to you?”
“I kissed you because I wanted to, I’ve wanted to for a while now.”
“But I’m with him and he’s your best friend!”
“But you love me,”
“I’m not so sure anymore.”
“You don’t have to stop yourself for his sake, he’ll get over it,” Luke’s voice sounded factual, like he was not at all bothered by Ryuu seeing them like that.
She decided to ignore him and she ran all the way back to the house where she found Ryuu just entering the entrance.
“Ryuu!” she called once more “please talk to me,”
He stopped with his back to her and whispered “What should I say?”
“Tell me that you’re mad, retaliate or do whatever it is that you usually do when you’re angry, just do something.”
“You’re so mean,” he said turning to look at her “you told me you didn’t like me because I was mean but I see now that you’re the mean one. I’ve never toyed with other people’s feelings, I’ve never made them think that I feel for them what I don’t, I’ve never given false hope and then extinguished it – you extinguished mine in the worst way.” he wasn’t yelling and that made his words seem worse somehow.
“I’m sorry, I am, I didn’t mean to do that…I just…I’m so sorry.”
“I can’t handle all this right now,” he said afraid that he might take out his anger on her, he was mad at her and he did feel betrayed but he had always known what a fool she was for Luke. He was mad at Luke, Luke who was supposed to be his best friend, Luke who he had known his entire life he couldn’t believe that he would do that to him.
Luke hadn’t even tried to apologize; he was just looking at him like he didn’t need to explain why he had just kissed Malkia, like it didn’t matter than he was hurting Ryuu.
Ryuu went to his room and called the pilot, he asked Ally to make the plans and he was out of Moor in less than an hour, he didn’t care if he had to leave all of them behind, he didn’t care that there were people there that could not afford the trip back, all he cared about was that he not hurt the girl he loved when all she had done was love someone else – and cheated on him.
So maybe that was why he left her there as well.