Get out of my life

Chapter 15

Keith pov

"Keith, what the hell?" Pidge said storming up to me with a might that only short people possess.
"What?"  I said, mind already reeling and panic spiraling into a pit in my stomach. 
"Why would you sleep with Lotor? You knew the rivalry thing he had with Lance."
"Woah woah, sleep with him?! I-I never said that!" I recounted cheeks flushed at the entire experience
"Wait what? Then why'd you agree?" she replied, a storm of fury completely shut off; she merely looked at me now dumbfounded, tone so regular it gave me whiplash. 
"well, because he was saying that we've kissed," I said "We did" Pidge now placed her forefinger and thumb on her nose, pinching the bridge, glasses falling lopsided on her face as she did so.

"You innocent idiot, he was obviously insinuating that you guys had done the deed." 

Now I was confused. Really?

"Really?"
"Yes! Really! you should tell that to Lance!"
"That we just kissed?" 

"Yes! that you JUST kissed, You bird brain!  Go! Now!"

"Oh, okay-" I turned to, but didn't need to get up, because Lance had stormed back in with Hunk, who was desperately telling him to stop and that this was a "bad idea", but that didn't slow Lance down as he came back up to us, eyes piercing and fury rippling off his aura. I felt my anxiety spike at the sight of him, but was determined to not let my mind get the best of me.

surely, this was my mind warping situations into what they weren't right? Lance had always said I could trust him and he wouldn't so I gathered any sense of pride and tried.
"Lance I-" I began
"I thought you were different" 

what? 

"Who do you think you are?! You knew from the start how much I hate Lotor, and you still went and fucked him like the slut you are!" Chills went down my body when he said that. his face was raging fury and I was certain those words were not in my head. the voice in my head was right all along. I should have known. My chest was tight. My face was red. I looked around at the spectacle of half the people on the quad looking at me. a slut. Especially because of how loud he was talking. he continued
"You're - you're just like an evil - trap, aren't you?!" his voice was cracking, and I could see tears wetting his ocean eyes. 
"Lance-" Hunk tried to say but he just spoke over him, getting louder, and louder.

"Does it feel nice to lie to people? Does it feel good to go behind their back? Well, here's a newsflash: you're just a nobody. No one wants people like you!" Up until that point I was trying to ignore the hateful words, glancing at anyone but him, hoping that people surrounding would somehow not see me - until that point. That stung. Maybe I deserved this. 

You deserve this

I attempted to hold back my tears as I stood. I couldn't even see him anymore, he was a blur. everything was. I should have pushed Lotor off of me, I should have done more, why did you sit there like a slut and let it happen? 
"I'm sorry" I whimpered out quietly to Lance before I ran out. I had barely turned away from him when the tears fell from my face. it's not that it mattered. He was right. I never deserved him. And just like that, I had broken once more.

Knowing there was no place for me, I ran into the bathroom and held my breath. It was going to happen again, I knew it. Panic attack.

Lance pov.

I was so incredibly angered and hurt that I had said all those terrible things to Keith. I knew I had gone too far when he stood up. Everyone was watching us now because of the scene I made, it didn't matter to me though, nothing felt like it mattered. I had tried so hard to get him to open up to me just for him to open up to not just anyone else, Lotor, the worst person I'd ever met.

Still though, as he ran away, embarrassed and tears slipping from his eyes I didn't feel any better for telling him off. My instincts were telling me to protect Keith as he hated people watching him, but I was blinded by my anger. He looked up at me. He was very visibly about to cry but he held it in and choked out an "I'm sorry" before he fled. His voice sounded broken. It immediately stabbed my heart. I wanted to chase after him, but instead, I turned to face my fuming friends. 

that's when things started to get worse. Uh oh.

Hunk went first.
"Lance, you did not have to be that mean! Do you see how much you hurt him?" I knew that. I already felt terrible. 

"well, he hurt me too..." I mumbled But when Pidge spoke it was way worse.

"YOU IDIOT!"
"Hey, I'm not dumb" I replied 
"yes, you are! Do you know why? Because Keith never slept with Lotor!"

"What?" Hunk and I both said, looking over to her in shock
"Yes! And he was going to try to tell you that, but you were just screaming at him, calling him a slut for no good reason! Did you even ask how it went down?" I felt my stomach drop just then, a whirlwind of emotions finally coming to a calm. 

"you don't know him as well as I do Lance, as much as you might like to think you do, and even if Kieth was interested in Lotor in some way, I don't think that he would act that way knowing the context between you too, he's far too considerate of other peoples feelings - to a fault in fact, I'm sure there's a reason for this. We just need to ask him! But here you go and ruin everything like the dunce you are!" she wouldn't let either of us get a word in as she lectured. I felt myself sinking lower and lower to the ground, melting and blending in with the grass. I was a fool, I was the nothing, I was the most heartless person alive. I didn't even ask him and he never slept with Lotor. better yet, I listened to the one guy who I know wants to make my life harder on purpose. what was wrong with me? 

And poor Keith. He wouldn't ever do something that harmful. he was always such a deep and thoughtful person, he was so deep in his thoughts - honestly, how could he have even kissed Lotor? that was the one piece that didn't make sense, but that would have to wait, because right now, I was in a whole load of deeper shit. 

I was speechless. This is not good. None of this is good. The pit in my stomach got deeper. It was like a black hole. Why would I listen to Lotor of all gremlins before my boyfriend? If he even is my boyfriend after all of that. I needed to find him. Where would he be? Shit.