Head Above Water

Chapter 8

Kim put on his uniform of a red soccer jersey, white shorts and matching socks. He took a deep breath and glanced around. He never had anxiety going out on the field but suddenly felt restless maybe it's because he knew the crowd would be watching, watching to see what the 'suicide boy' would do.   

He startled when Chad slapped him on the back.

"Don't sweat it man" he said casually "Coach said it's only this one game you don't get to be captain cause you missed some practice sessions"

Kim forced a smile on his face as he glanced at Chad. The same Chad who was his best friend since kindergarten. Over the years they grew apart but not completely. Guys don't talk about feelings and things. They just hung out and played video games. When they did talk,it was girls, parties and sports.

Yet as he lay in his hospital bed pretending to be asleep when he did not feel like company which was often. He overheard Chad talking to him like he was awake. He heard him say that he wanted to ask if he was okay. That he could see Kim was not okay but he did not know if he should. He was doubting to be a good friend and he should have been there and took more notice of Kim. It made Kim feel like crap, like he let his friend down.

Kim was not upset about Chad being captain but he was upset that he let the team down. The coach's voice brought him back to reality

"Okay girls! Try not to dissapointed and embarrass me!"

The boys chuckled and then proceeded to jog outside onto the field. Kim looked at the direction of cheerleaders and saw Roche smiling broadly as she led the squat in their routine. She winked at him like she always did and he waved at her. He looked up at the crowd and saw his mother waving at him. Something tugged at his heart seeing her smiling proudly at him in the crowd and he played his heart out surprising everyone when he scored a goal even though they lost.

All the boys congratulated Kim on his goal and they made plans to go to Chad's house after the game immediately counting Kim in without asking just assuming. As they left and entered the parking lot Kim noticed his mother waiting at her car.

"Is that your mother?" Roche asked and he glanced at her. She only saw his mother briefly as she was always busy. When Roche did come around they would just fool around Kim's room.

Kim gently unlocked Roche's arm around his.

"I'm sorry" he let out and she lifted her eyebrows. She grabbed his upper arm again.

"Do you want me to come with?" She bit her bottom lip. He heard her words but her face was saying something else. He shook his head.

"I'll be okay"

He pretended to ignore the guys booing him as he walked away but his attention was on his mother's face lighting up when she saw him. She hesitated then wrapped her arms around him. He hesitated then hugged her back.

"I'm so proud of you" she let out bubbly.

"I thought you..." He rubbed the back of his head. He never knew why she did not come to his games before but she was there now.

"I'm really glad you came" he let out.

They got in the car and her phone rang. She glanced at the name, Caroline that appeared on the screen and bit her lips. Then she answered. She listened then replied, "I'd love to but I have other plans"

She glanced at Kim when she said that "I know the invitation will never come around again besides I don't have a date" she ended the call and started the car.

Kim shuffled in his seat. He did not want to see her upset.

"You can go whatever it is, Mom"

She glanced at him then smiled open mouth.

"Come with me" she suggested and his eyes widened "It's an invite to my friend Caroline's book launch at an art gallery"

Kim chuckled but she was serious and he found himself nodding making her smile wider than before as she drove off.