8 Years Gap

Gap #55

Angeli's POV

"I really love you." Bulong niya sa tenga ko at di niya alam kung gaano niya ako pinasaya sa mga salitang yun.

"But there are two things I want to ask." Binitawan niya ako at binalik niya ang tingin niya sa kinatatayuan nila Ate Iyah at Sean, na ngayong wala na sa may tabi ng dagat.

"H-huh?" Nagulat ako sa tanong niya at kinalma ko na lang sarili ko.

"Do you think you can change me?" Tinanong niya ako, mata sa mata na para bang may hinahanap siyang sagot.

Huminga ako ng malalim at sinagot siya.

"I honestly don't know because I don't want you to change for me. Change is inevitable and that I understand. If you ask me the same question, I can't change for you because the choices are my own. If some of my choices change, then I changed. There's nothing wrong of changing yourself by yourself." Ngumiti lang siya sa akin na parang nasagot ko yung tanong.

"Sean asked me how am I different when I'm with you and I can't answer him. Can you answer that for me?" Parang ang hirap naman ng pangalawang tanong niya.

"Different for you means holding back? Waiting?" Ang labo naman kasi ng tanong niya eh, masyadong malawak.

"Or don't tell me, you're after my body?" Biro ko sa kanya.

"Idiot, not that." Napangiti na lang ako at tiningnan siya ng maigi.

"Then what is it?" Ngiting tanong ko sa kanya.

"I'm waiting for the right time to tell you my feelings because I don't want to get in the way of your future. I wanted to kiss you, but I can't. We can't possibly start from being friends with benefits and worst, it would hurt you. I want to hug you, but it would mean to invade your personal space. I want--." Pinutol ko na yung sasabihin niya.

"I heard enough. Now I know the answer to your second question." Napangiti na lang ako sa kanya.

I wonder how deep I'll fall for this person.

"What is it?" Huminga na lang ako ng malalim at sinabi sa kanya ang naiisip ko.

"Sean is right. I'm different from the others because of the age difference, but maybe that's a good thing for you." Ngiting sagot ko sa kanya.

"And why is that?" Nagtataka niyang tanong.

"You felt to become more serious than before because you're more experienced than me. You want to protect my innocence, one way or another. As much as possible, you want me to be happy. Maybe you might make me cry, but not to the point of making me broken. It just means that how you love depends on someone you love. There's nothing wrong with that." Tumango na lang siya at mukhang nasagot ko naman yung tanong ni Sean na hindi niya masagot.