Nothing Left For You (Vminkook)

28

Jimin

When I walk into the house the first thing I notice is a few boxes piled up by the stairs, all taped up and ready to go.

Taehyung must have decided that he'd leave if things didn't work out.

Even now as I stand here I don't know what to do, if I should forgive him or call it quits.

It'd be so easy to quit and give up right now, but after all these years of sacrifice and devotion was I truly ready?

"Mr. Park." Rayla says rushing towards me, bowing before continuing. "Are you okay? Where have you been the past few days?"

I smile a little at her concern. "I've been at a friend's. But I'm fine."

She nods, her worried gaze falling on my wrapped hand.

"I sprained my wrist. It's no big deal." I reassure her. "Is Taehyung here?"

"He's upstairs, I believe." She says, her expression worrying me.

"Is he alright?" I ask in concern.

"Just not himself I suppose." Rayla says. "Should I tell him to come down?"

"No, thank you. You can go home, Rayla. Thank you for being here." I say, bowing before going upstairs.

When I get to our bedroom I find the door slightly ajar, Taehyung sitting on the bed with his back to me.

I knock on the door and I walk in to get his attention.

"Rayla, I've already told you that I don't need~" he falls silent when he looks back and sees me standing here. "Oh...Jimin."

"I hope you don't mind that I sent Rayla home." I say, just to avoid the awkward silence I felt approaching.

"No, it's fine. That's okay." He says standing and facing me.

And there it is, that awkward silence.

In all honesty I've never seen Taehyung look as disheveled as he does now, not ever.

His hair was messy and he was dressed in a pair of slacks and a button down that he must've worn to work, his eyes were tired and he looked all thrown together.

"H-How have you been?" He offers, trying to fill the silence.

"Fine." I say, nodding and looking around the room. "I-I don't know why I came here, but I had to come here."

He nods silently, probably waiting for me to continue.

"I...I've been trying to think for the past day or so and I can't really figure out what to do." I say honestly. "I love you, Taehyung. And if I said I didn't I'd be lying. After everything we've been through I don't think I'll ever stop loving you."

He nods, staying silent again.

"What you did, what you were doing, Tae. It broke my heart, it did. My heart is broken." I say, trying my best to speak from my heart. "And even though broken things are hard to put back together it isn't completely impossible. Sure, it takes time and so much effort to try and piece it together and it'll never be perfect but it's possible nonetheless."

I sigh as I try to find the right words to express myself.

"My problem is that I don't know if I'm willing to take that time and give that extra effort to put things back together." I say, tears starting to burn my eyes. "I'm not exactly mad anymore, I'm pissed the hell off, yes, but I'm not mad at you or myself just the situation. The damage is done and there's nothing we can do about it now. I want to forgive you, I do. Because, like I said, we have too much history together. But I don't want to cheat myself by forgiving so easily."

"I understand." He finally speaks, his expression and his voice completely concealing his true emotions.

"I'm trying to follow my heart but my heart has a mad habit of being overemotional. So I have to go with my head a little right now." I say, blinking away my tears. "I forgive you, Taehyung. You are forgiven, okay?"

Taehyung nods, biting his lip as he blinks his own tears away. "Thank you."

"I'm forgiving you for me and because I know that if I don't I'll be angry forever." I say. "But just because I'm forgiving doesn't mean I'm forgetting."

"I understand." He repeats, bringing his hand up to wipe his eyes before his tears fall.

"Not to hop on my soapbox again, but I put everything I had into this relationship. I loved you unconditionally and did everything I could to try and satisfy you and make you happy. I'm sorry that at some point I wasn't enough for you. But it isn't fair, I was only ever a good partner to you and it isn't fair that you did this to me." I say, quickly wiping the tears that fall as I speak. "Through everything I stuck by you and supported you, god I must've looked like and idiot to Jungkook."

"Don't." Taehyung says shaking his head.

"Don't what? It happened, Taehyung. Like I said, the damage is done." I say. "I don't think it'd be fair to myself to stay here, that's why I'm leaving."

Taehyung's gaze drops, he always avoids my eyes when he cries.

"For the first time in a long time, I'm making a decision for myself." I say. "I'm leaving, for me. Because I want to and I will. And I hope you understand."

"I understand, Jimin." He says looking up at me, his voice wavering despite his attempt to keep it steady.

I turn to the door to leave, stopping short. "But when I get back, I want a summer wedding."

I turn back around in time to see his confused expression.

"A summer wedding on the beach. And a garden in the backyard." I continue. "A swing for the porch and a little pomeranian that we can put on the front of our Christmas cards next year."

He still looks confused but he doesn't speak.

"After I work on me for a little while, I want to work on us." I clarify. "Because I can't help but love you, Kim Taehyung."

"I love you too, Jimin." He says back, not bothering to catch his tears.

"Take care of yourself while I'm gone, please?" I ask, never failing to worry for him.

"I will." He promises, wiping his eyes quickly.

I smile a little. "Goodbye, Taehyung...for now."

"For now."

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