Little things - Taekook (ON HIATUS)

Chapter 17

YOU CHOSE: more taejinkook discussion time! (and a lot of you wanted Big Tae because we haven't seen much of that...I'll see what I can do)

Jin leans forward, regarding me with curious eyes. "So, Jungkook, why did you choose Daegu University?" he asks quietly, and I shrug, taking a bite of the cookie and thinking for a moment in the process.
"I don't really know, to be honest. I just felt like I'd be happy here. You have to get a good vibe from a university, I think, because you'll spend a lot of your life here. As it turns out, it was probably the best possible choice for me." 

Jin tilts his head. "How so?"
"I mean, I saw an old friend again for the first time in years. I found myself a job which I love that lets me work on the same sort of stuff as my studies, thanks to Hoseok hyung. I've made some new friends as well, thanks to my course and thanks to circumstance." My gaze lingers on Taehyung for a moment, and his friend smiles a little at that.
"You care about him, don't you?" 

"I mean, yeah," I say awkwardly, blushing, knowing that he can hear me. The faint smile on his face is enough to determine that he's listening to everything, so I have to be careful. I can't say the wrong thing, or he could end up being unhappy or something. "I like to think we're friends by now, at least, you know?" 

Taehyung looks up. "We are friends," he confirms, running a hand through his silver hair and picking up his hot chocolate, drinking some of it quietly, hissing a little at the way it's still a bit too hot to drink. "You've been quite respectful and understanding of my needs thus far, and I appreciate that. I'm used to being treated like...well, like shit. But you seem to want to avoid that, which is always nice." 

Jin raises an eyebrow at the swear word, and Taehyung lowers his head. "Sorry, forgot you don't like bad language, hyung. I aged up without even noticing, I think," he admits quietly, and his friend shrugs, nodding in understanding. 
"I was more just confused as to why someone with the mindset of a seven year old would randomly say the word 'shit' so casually, but ageing up makes sense. Don't worry, Tae, I'm not mad."

"Promise?"
"Pinky promise," Jin says playfully, and Taehyung blinks a few times, shaking his head. The older male frowns a little, looking concerned. "Did I make you-"
"No, no, I managed to keep the same age this time. I'm getting better at controlling it, can you tell?" Taehyung reassures him, a proud expression on his face, and Jin chuckles a little. 
"You're doing really well, Tae." 

I raise my hand, feeling a little awkward, and the two of them glance over at me. "You alright, Jungkook?" Jin asks quietly. 
"Yeah, I'm fine, just had a question."
"Fire away."
"Tae, when you do switch from Little to Big, how does it feel?" 

Taehyung's eyes widen in understanding. "It's disorientating," he starts, playing with his fingers, "because you go from understanding everything to nothing making sense. Your body doesn't feel like the right size anymore, too big and heavy and 'adult'. It's not the same as a personality disorder, not really, but your processing skills kind of...regress somehow? I don't know if that makes any sense." 

"No, I think I get it. Thank you for trying to explain, though, I do appreciate it. Must be difficult, sometimes," I comment sympathetically, and he shrugs.
"I've gotten a little more used to it, now, so it's not so bad. Anyway, this isn't all about me, so stop focusing on-"
"How can I avoid forcing you into Little space when you're not ready?" I interrupt, suddenly worrying that I might end up doing that by mistake.

The two boys opposite me freeze completely, eyes widening almost comically, and I panic. "Did I say something wrong? I didn't mean to be rude, or anything, I swear, I just wanted to help-" 

Jin raises a hand, stopping my hurried explanation. "Nobody new has ever asked that. Not many new people have ever bothered to ask how they can help him be in whatever headspace works better for him. And if they do, it's just because they want to have something they can use as a weapon against him. It's been a long time since anyone's taken him this seriously."