Parts of Falling In Love

Cheeks

Katie

August 21, 2016

I sat at the cafeteria, eating alone because Dex had some fraternity issues to deal with. What happened that night at the party was traumatic. The punches hitting your face felt like bullets shooting holes in my heart. Seeing you getting beaten frightened me more than anything else.

When I went to your house yesterday and saw the black and blues on your cheeks, I felt torn. The only thing that kept me from crying was your smile, or, well, your effort to smile, considering you couldn't stretch your bruised lip.

Talking to you again was unexpectedly easy, no more hatred nor anger. I told you that things couldn't be the same anymore because there's Dex and he's a pretty jealous boyfriend. I liked that about him though. He made me feel wanted, loved.

After a few minutes of eating my thoughts away, I found you sitting in front of me, telling me that my boyfriend is cheating on me.

I laughed, not sure why.

"I'm not," you said, emphasizing the word "not", " messing with you." you reached your bandaged hands out to hold mine, rubbing its rough surface at the back of my hands. Your eyes peered on me with pity.

"How would you know?" I asked, "Were you stalking him?" It was a joke and I tried to laugh again.

Your brows twirled, confused. "If you don't want to believe me, then go and ask him about it yourself." You pulled your hands away and stood up, fists balled and jaws clenched. "Come with me," you commanded and then started walking away.

I followed suit, shuffling my feet, thinking of why you were so eager to prove that I was stupid enough to not know if my boyfriend was cheating on me and the one week relationship I was having with him so far started with nothing but lies.

You led me to your car and told me we were going to see Dex. I didn't question you. Within the ten-minute drive, our mouths kept shut. We made our way into a corporate building. My head was spinning in confusion until the elevator opened and we saw Dex, holding a redhead by her waist and kissing her goodbye on the cheeks.

"Dimwit bastard!" You scowled, lunging towards him. I rushed to stop you, barricading you away from him.

"Stop!" I screamed but the word came out as a murmur. You tried to get out of my arms but I tightened them, afraid of witnessing you getting anymore bruises or broken knuckles.

Then I heard Dex say my name and apologize.

That's when everything sank in. I turned around and next thing I knew, I was pulling his hair, dragging him out of the elevator. He shrieked in pain and gripped my wrist to take my hand off of him. So I slapped him and then darted out of the building.

You ran after me and we stayed in your car, silent for a moment, until I started chortling.

We shared a look. "That was one hell of a slap," you said, a smile forming your lips, "It would definitively leave a mark."

"Yeah." I laughed, or thought I did, until my tears welled up in my eyes, blurring my vision. You wrapped your arms around me and rubbed my back as I chuckled, and whimpered, chuckled, and whimpered like I had been mentally deranged.

"I'm sorry, Katie," you whispered over my shoulders. I kept crying and after a few minutes that seemed like hours, I stopped. A voice inside me told me he wasn't worth it.

When there were no more whimpers escaping me, just sniffles, you moved back and wiped my tears away with your shirtsleeve. I hugged you tight and I don't know what got into me but I slowly brushed my flushed cheek over yours and stopped when our lips were millimeters apart.

Disappointment, hatred, and sadness whirled inside me. But my mind entertained the thought of kissing you, what it would feel like, if it could make it all go away. Your eyes drowned me with longing. Our lips hovered on each other. I fought the urge to crush my lips on you. It wasn't right. My mind screamed, telling me,"No, don't make him your rebound. Don't ruin the friendship you were just starting to build."

"My head aches," I grumbled, drawing back. You started the car engine and at the same time, cleared your throat and asked, "What's your next class?"

Taking a deep breath, I crossed my arms and leaned on the window. "It's a stupid class. I'd rather just go home." My weary eyes closed itself. The trickling of raindrops on the window distracted my thoughts, letting me drift away for a moment.

Next thing I knew, we were parked in front of your house. You didn't bring me home because I forgot to tell you what my new address was.

"Stay with me for a while. I'll take you home when the rain stops," you said, fiddling your fingers on the driving wheel, "Do you have an umbrella?" Your lips curved into an apologetic smile.

"So that's why you brought me with you huh. You don't want your perfect hair to get all wet," I teased and ruffled his hair. He just sat still, smiling at me. "Well, unlucky you. I don't have one."

I unlocked the car door and got off, letting the rain pour down on me. You yelled at me and told me not to damp myself or I might get sick. Ignoring you, I tipped my head up and let the rain drop on my cheeks, along with my tears.

"Happiness is so fucking momentary, I don't fucking want it anymore!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. Then you stepped in front of me and flipped me up your shoulders.

"I'm still gonna give it to you!" You said loudly, trying to overshadow the drumming of the rain.

You put me down at the living room and then you rushed upstairs. You came back with a towel and an oversized shirt and threw them at me, knowing I would be able to catch them.

"Get dressed, we have shows to watch," you commanded, raising up a cd compilation of adventure time and happy tree friends series.

I gave you a dubious look, thinking if you actually expected me to break up with Dex and prepared these shows to help me forget. I apparently thought that out loud and you didn't deny it.

We slumped down on the couch like how we used to-lying on our sides, a pillow in the middle for our heads to share, and our feet dangling on opposite sides of the couch. We watched the shows and laughed.

"Just like the old days," I thought to myself, seeing you asleep after the tenth episode, "Minus the snoring." I chuckled and gingerly got off the couch.

You drove me home and I pecked your cheek. My break up felt nothing but a small cut and I thanked you for it.

A while ago, I was browsing my facebook profile and saw a shared photo. It talked about a medicine called Riluzole. What caught my attention was that I remembered seeing it in your bathroom.

It's a medicine for people who have ALS, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis.

Life is such a bitch.