June seventeenth. That was the last time I saw Natalie. She drove to my house tired and disheveled after being at Bonnaroo for the last four days. We were on the phone sobbing the entire drive and I didn't know she was even coming until after she arrived.
When she turned in her car and saw me walking towards her no was all that fell from her mouth. Over and over again. No no no no no. She couldn't face me. Not after what she'd done. I wasn't sure I could handle looking at her either. Once I got into the car with her it was all I could see. Her kissing him. Someone else. After all of this time. Her letting someone else into her world. Her letting someone else touch her. I couldn't breathe.
I don't know why I kept asking questions. How did it happen. She'd answer. I'd tell her it didn't matter. What had she been wearing. She hadn't told me. That didn't matter either. This had to end. This horrible cycle had to end. I loved her too much to be around her. She wasn't good for me. She made me someone I never was before. She made me feel things I'd never felt. She made me a person I never thought I'd be. Every single time she touched me it was like I could feel him touching her.
Natalie could tell I was losing it. Going to a place that even I didn't know how to get out of. She begged me to go to bed and I put my hand on that same car handle and time and time again. I couldn't open the door. I just broke down. Over and over again. The girl I thought was mine watched me sob and wretch. She watched my face become so contorted by the safeness that I didn't look like the boy she'd come to see. Finally I gave in and got out of her car. "Go straight home. Don't do anything stupid" I'd said. It came out so harsh. "Text me when you get home" softer. I waited up for over 40 minutes before calling, worried. She answered "almost home. Get some sleep" and again I told her to text me when she got home. I didn't care how close she was. It was raining hard and she'd never been any good at driving in the dark anyway. When she finally texted me I asked for her location. To be sure. Confused at first, she obliged and the last thing we said was goodnight. Then came sleep.
YOU ARE READING
The last time
RomanceThis is just another love story that goes wrong, because real love usually does. This time, the story just happens to be true. I thought I'd seen the boy I loved for the last time so many times that when I finally really did, I didn't know what to d...
