Downtown Idea

64. Castaway (Finale pt. 1

Young love, close the chapter, there's no ever after. Or so I've heard.

After I left the coffee shop I went straight back to the house Ashton bought me. I knew I literally could not stay in LA so I started packing. I packed up me and Louise before thinking about it.

Obviously she would have to stay with me for at least now, but what would custody look like? And where was I going to stay for now? What about jobs?

I thought for a moment I had made a mistake but looking around me I knew I was doing what was right for me.

I called Reese to see if I could stay with her. It sounded a bit loud.

"Of course! Full house though. Mali is here and so in Jonas' band. Come on over though!" And she hung up. I sighed.

A few months later found me and Louise moving into a lovely apartment back where I felt most at home, New York City.

As I was getting ready for a recording session I got a knock on the door. It was my lawyer.

"Zoe, we have a slight problem. Ashton wants joint custody of Lady." She said sitting down on the couch.

"Okay." I was fine with that. I would be pissed if he didn't want to help raise her, "What's wrong with that?"

"You live too far away to have equal custody." She crossed her legs and opened up her folder. "I suggest we compromise with Joint Legal and sole Physical custody. Meaning that she would live with you but she can go see him or stay with him if she so chooses, on top of that you both get a say in choices for her future." I nodded.

"I wouldn't try to take her from him. I don't want to hurt him, or her. She's quite fond of her dad." I smiled to myself. After some more custody talk I signed the papers for her to send them to his lawyer. Thankfully this has been a relatively easy transition.

As I said goodbye to my Lawyer Reese called me.

"Hey honey, how the big apple?" She asked. I filled her in on the moving and the job offers, "Hows the song writing going? Any ideas for tunes?" She asked. We had been talking about maybe writing songs together again but who's to say what could come of that.

"Yeah, but they're not really your style." I laughed. She laughed with me. How long it had been since we were both laughing. "How's Ashton? He only talks to me like we're business partners." I asked. I was actually curious.

"He's pissed off. Especially since you're in New York now, and because you took your daughter with you." She chucked nervously, "He's struggling with this breakup." I knew she didn't get why I broke everything off, but this felt right. It really was all on accident, and I want it to be on purpose.

"He gets to see her soon." I said gently, "I want him to be part of her life." I shrugged, "either way I think that he'll make it."

"I'm sure." She started talking about her and Calum and she mentioned Brodie and how Jonas is even getting used to being back in LA. He was going to go back to Scotland but he got comfortable in LA and that's where Luke was. So he decided to stay. Life was exactly how it started (except two new people in the world.)

As I talked to my sister I watched my baby pull herself up and fall back down over and over. My heart overflowed for her and I couldn't imagine life without her.

I stood to pack up her diaper bag when something Reese said caught me by surprise.

"Me and a Calum were talking about getting married, if won't be for a long while but I wanted to make sure you were going to be my maid of honor." She said chuckling. I smiled and nodded even though I knew she couldn't see me.

"Of course!" I said after a second of just insane nodding.

They didn't get married until literally two years later. They had their ups and downs but nothing like they used to be. The worst part was knowing I would have to see Ashton for an extended period of time. I was staying with him that week just for ease of taking care of Lady.

"Hey." He said opening the door for us, "Lady!" He said watching her toddle into the house with a sippy cup in one arm and her favorite stuffed unicorn in the other.

"Hi Da." She said. We practiced that on the plane. Ashton put his hands on his face and smiled at her before scooping her up and kissing her face.

"I missed you bean." He said. She started dropping her unicorn and started making struggling noises.

"Mama!" She said loudly, "mama hold." I took them from her and smiled.

"Are you guys hungry?" He asked me seriously. He always turned on this somber tone when he spoke to me.

"She'll eat anything you put in front of her whether she's hungry or not. But I'm okay. I'm just gonna go ahead and put our stuff in her room." I said pulling our bag towards the stairs. It was strange. Ashton wasn't even staying in his house now. It was the house he got for me. I felt a twinge of guilt but I tried to shrug it off.

When I finally got back up stairs Ashton was on the couch with Louise and they were snacking on chips and watching TV. I smiled and just watched them for a while.

For dinner we ordered in pizza. We talked about wedding plans and, unfortunately, we talked about us.

"Was it something I did?" He asked. It was a pretty light hearted conversation actually. Lady had just fallen asleep on the couch and we were just talking.

"At this point I don't even remember. I just know I needed to feel like I was making a choice." I lied. I remembered in great detail.

"That's fair I guess." He said sighing, "Would you ever give me another chance?" I shrugged.

"We'll see." I kissed his cheek before picking up Lady and carrying her to her room. When I came out I met Ashton in the hallway.

"Im sure you remember where the guest room is?" He asked before leading me to the door. I smiled at him and followed.

Getting in bed I thought about him. Being with him made me think of how much I missed him. But I also knew that I couldn't live the life I was living when I was with him. In this house.

I had three days until the wedding. Four days to endure before we go home and enjoy the loud of New York City. Our days were filled with helping the bride and groom prepare for their big day.

The next night we went out to dinner as a family. After we went home Lady went to sleep and we stayed up talking (and drinking) again. He told me how sad he was to see me go, but how he understood. As much as he didn't want to, he knew it was what I wanted.

The third night we stayed in. We had developed a habit in the past few days of staying up, talking, and drinking together. This time there was....less talking. And more....staying up.

The next morning was the day of the wedding and I was distracted. For obvious reasons.

The ceremony was beautiful, and Reece was barely a bridezilla. Apparently Calum was more of a bridezilla than the actual bride. I didn't doubt it.

"We need to talk." Ashton said in unison with me after the reception.

And after a few hours of us talking and making compromises and deals we decided to (attempt) to date again.

I'm: nervous about it. But our "first" date is next month during one of their recording breaks. He said he would take me to a fancy restaurant and we would try to actually date. He agreed that we didn't date enough the first go around.

But I'm excited to see where this goes.