Romanogers Part 2💗

Chapter 4: Leaving

*Natasha's point of view*

Once we left the apartment to see if there was an update on Bruce's location, I was scared. I refused to show anyone that I was scared, not even Steve. He kept telling me that we would find him in no time but I knew that was a lie. He was worried as well, he knew that we were not going to find Bruce easily and it would be a really dangerous task to face him and get him in prison. We all knew it, but no one wanted to say.

We both got on to the elevator and as soon as it started going up, memories of me and Bruce in the elevator came rushing back. I tried to keep my cool and brush off the memory but I lost my balance and fell to the floor.
"Nat! Are you okay?!" Steve asked, helping me back to my feet. His face was full of worry. I didn't want to leave him. But I had to.
"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm not sure what happened." I lied. My mask was so thick that Steve couldn't see through it. The elevator door opened and we walked to the conference room.

We opened the door and everyone was already there, sitting around the table. I stared at Steve all the way through the meeting. I zoned out and agreed to anything anyone asked me because I already had my plan. I felt like I had someone staring at me near the end of the meeting and looked over to see Clint mouth the words 'see me after this', I nodded and he turned back to face Tony who was rambling.

The meeting was useless. The only thing that you could actually take away from it was that Bruce has disappeared and he was off the radar. Steve and Tony went to Tony's Lab after the meeting, Steve seemed scared to leave me but I told him I would be fine. He kissed my cheek and left with Tony.

"My Apartment. 15 minutes. We need to talk. Urgently." I heard a voice say behind me and I could immediately tell it was Clint. I turned around and saw the worried yet angry look on his face. He met my gaze and then walked out of the room. What was so urgent that he needs to talk to me in 15 minutes? Why was he being so serious? Has he somehow found out about my plan for tomorrow? I hope not.

*15 minutes later*

I knocked on the door and Clint immediately opened it and let me in. I closed the door behind me and we walked to the couch and sat down.
"What's so urgent you need to see me?" I asked, still confused.
"Why are you leaving?" He asked, his face was angry yet upset. How did he know?! How could he?!
"I'm not leaving! I'm not going anywhere!" I lied and he saw right through me.
"Bullshit. You wouldn't look around the table and look at Steve the way you did if you weren't going anywhere! I walked out the room and watched you to confirm my suspicions and see you hug everyone so tightly!" He yelled. Clint never really yells. I looked down at my feet, embarrassed. He spoke again but this time it was softer and more upset. "Nat, look. I know I can't stop you. You know I can't stop you. The only one who might be able to is Steve and I'm not going to tell him because I know you'll kick my ass!" I smiled and he smiled as well. "I just want to know one thing." His eyes looked desperately into mind for some kind of reason for me leaving. "Why?"
"I'm sorry." I squeaked, trying to hold back my escaping tears.
"Nat, please tell me why?" He repeated. I moved closer to him and he put his arm around me. I started sobbing.
"I know I'm not safe here. I'm not safe anywhere. Neither is Steve all the time he is with me. I've got to protect him. I've got to protect all of you until I can find him and finish this once and for all. I need to do this alone." I look up with my bloodshot eyes to see that Clint is crying as well. He knew I was going on a suicide mission.
"I'm only a call away if you need back up or even to chat. I will text you every update on his location we get."
"Thanks" I smiled at him, a genuine 'I'm really sorry but I have to do this and I want to thank you for supporting me' smile. He smiled back and we both sat in silence, staring at the wall.
"Promise me one thing, Nat." I looked up and he had a tear streaming down his red cheeks. "After all this is done, you come home. You do not leave again."
"I promise." I couldn't wait to come home and feel safe. "Can you promise me something?" I asked and he nodded. "Please make sure that while I'm gone and forever more-" Clint cut me off.
"Don't do that."
"Do what?"
"Do this. The whole 'If I die look after Steve' routine because your not going to die."
"Clint. You know how dangerous this is. You know there is a small chance I'll make it out alive-"
"Please Nat, don't do this." He was shaking and tears were falling down his cheeks very frequently and he held me tight to him.
"I'm sorry." I felt so bad.
"I promise to you, Natasha Romanoff, that if you should get hurt or... killed, I will make sure Steve knows you love him with all your heart and I'll make sure he knows it wasn't his fault." He said through the tears and smiled at me. "Your such a pain in the ass." He laughed.
"Well, you'd be worried if I wasn't!" I laughed back until all went quiet. "I can't go back and see him. I won't leave if I do." I looked down at the ground.
"I know you don't want to tell him in person that your leaving but make sure you tell him somehow. See him once more. Even if you don't talk to him or he doesn't even notice your there."

We sat talking for another hour until I knew I had to go since the sun was going down. We were standing in the corridor next to the door and Clint hugged me tight. So tight.
"I'm going to miss you." He said when we parted.
"I'll miss you too. Always. Thank you for being there." I cried. Tears were streaming down both of our faces, I'm surprised I had anymore tears to let out my eyes!
"I'll always be there." He replied as he hugged me once more.
"Goodbye Clint." I said as I walked out of the door.
"I hate the word goodbye! Let's just say 'see ya'." He replied.
"See ya Clint."
"See ya Natasha."

*Clints Point of view*

I watched her walk down the corridor and go into her apartment. My best friend. My shoulder to cry on. My partner in crime. The last time I may ever see her again. This mission she is going on is suicide. I stepped back in my apartment and shut the door. I placed my head on the door.
"Goodbye Nat." I broke down into tears and I shrank to the floor. I'm not leaving my apartment tonight. I can't handle it. I've got to deal with Steve tomorrow and I am not ready for that.

*Natasha's point of view*

I stepped into the apartment.
"Steve?" I asked but got no replies. That means he wasn't here. That's good. I can't face him. I got all my clothes from his apartment up together but left one of my tshirts and took one of his. Once I was packed and ready, I got a piece of paper and wrote a letter to Steve. I folded it up and put it on the table. I wrote 'Steve' in capital letters on the front.

I walked out the apartment with my bags and headed for the garage. Thankfully, I didn't run into anyone. I was crying so much from writing Steve's letter and I still hadn't got it out my system. I got to the garage and went over to my Mercedes and put my bags in the back. I hesitated in opening the driver side door. I couldn't open it. I had to see Steve before I left.

I went to Tony's lab. I'm thankful that I'm a spy because no body knew I was there. Bruce and Tony were the only ones there so I left and went to the shared living room which was empty. I realised there is one place I hadn't checked yet.

I approached the gym doors and saw Steve punching away at a bag. His disheveled hair, the concentration he had when punching the bags, he always made me calm for him harder when he was working out. I stood at the doors of the gym watching him punch the 5th bag he has gone through in the last 10 minutes. I had a moment of deja vu. I first met him in a gym. He was punching away at those bags and I fell for him. The bag soon gave way and the chain snapped from his strength.

I saw him move away from the bag and head towards the doors I was standing in. Had he seen me? Without thinking, I ran back to the elevator and pressed the button to the garage before he could even open the doors. I walked up to my car and sat in the drivers side. I cried hard and I screamed as much as I could. I wanted to run into his arms but I couldn't. I had to do this. I straightened myself out and drove out of Avengers Tower. I headed straight for the Airport.

End of Leaving