To See The Stars

Chapter Four: Jax

"Come on man, what's up with you? Something's going on.", I rack up the pool balls, for a game of eight ball. Toby, impatiently chalks his pool cue. If you don't say anything, Tony would end up chalking his cue all day, or slowly start to pick the cue apart.

"What are you talking about? Just shut up and rack the balls.", Toby sets the cue ball on the green felt on the other side of the pool table. I finish racking, just as he finishes positioning it. He bounces on his heels, like he's trying to dodge my questions.

"Don't lie to me, I know you too well. These past few weeks it seems like you've tried to fight just about everyone. And don't say ya haven't cause every time ya do, I have to bail you out, so ya aren't murdered.", Toby pulls back the cue, aims, and thrusts his cue forward with way too much power then he needed. The balls fly in every direction, and thankfully stay on the table. He lowers his face ever so slightly and then raises it again, a smirk back on his face.

"It's fine, man, there's just a lot going on right now.", Toby lowers his eyes for a second and frowns before covering it up with a smirk that's not quite there.

"Is it those assholes down by Pikevine? Because if it is, I swear to god, I will kill them.", I aim my shot for the 2 ball, and make it before I aim for another one, glancing up at Toby while I do.

"No! No! It's not them... It's just..." Toby sighs, "It's my dad, he's getting worse.", Toby looks away. His dad's been pretty bad for a while, but the guy's tougher than anyone I know. It never occured to me that he could actually die. I've known him so long. It just seemed so... impossible.

"How much worse?", I pause before I shoot, and look at Toby, missing the ball. Toby moves closer to the table, and positions himself, before he sinks a ball. I wait patiently for him, knowing this must be hard to talk about. I mean, it's hard for me to even think about, I can't imagine what it must be like for Toby.

"The doctors said that it's just a matter of time before he dies, and they don't think they can save him this time.", Toby shoots, hitting a ball off the table and just lets it roll away. We both watch in silence, before someone yells at us to grab the ball, setting us into motion. I grab the ball for Toby, since I'm closer, and Toby just chalks his cue.

"Damn, I don't even know what to think. I never thought it was possible for someone like him to die."
Toby gives a half-assed laugh and says, "Yeah, neither did I."
I search my brain for words, any at all. The vast abyss of rubbish that is my mind, shrugs it's shoulders at me. We play pool silently for about two minutes before my mind shoots out, "You know I care about you, right?" I immediately want to burn the guy that is in charge of my conversational skills, alive.

Toby stares at me, quizzingly. "What are you talking about?"

And then there it is again. "When you get in fights, I'm always scared you'll get hurt. When you go off on your own, and take long walks when you don't want anyone to see you sad, I worry about you. And I know that when you want to cry, you start to crack jokes, and try to smile through your pain, but I always wish you'd tell me what's troubling you. Toby, I care about you. Did you know that?"

I watch as one of Toby's shields drop, and he looks up, into my eyes. He's shocked. He stumbles over his words, "I mean- Yeah- I mean- no- yeah- No. No." He looks down.

I've known him so long, but I don't think I've ever seen him look so vulnerable. I put my hands on his shoulders and look him in the eyes. "Toby Philips, I. Care. About. You. You been my friend longer than I can remember, and I will always care about you. Nothing you say, could ever make me hate you. Nothing. And I hope you know that."

Toby looks up at me, completely and utterly blown away. I watch as his eyes smile at me. "I-I- I- Thank you- I- I mean- I- thank you. Thank you." The star that's inside of him, lets out it's first solar flare, and he smiles at me.

I give him a hug, and guide him by his shoulders, towards the front of the pool hall, to pay. "Come on, let's go get something to eat." His body lights out at the mention of food. Maybe I should have started that with let's get something to eat. Guess the conversation guy lives another day.