The Soldier

lost in what could have been

Falling.

Falling.

Whisper in a language she could not understand. Gold sparkle all around her, stopping her fall. They turned green, and she fell again.

„Can you imagine, the two of us sitting on your balcony, having too much breakfast and our cute little dog-"

„I told you I'm not going to betray Wendy with some random puppy.", Tessa interrupted Ziva laughingly.

„We can have both, okay? They will get along just fine.", Ziva said, laying her arm around Tessa who let her head drop on Ziva's shoulder, smelling dust and forest. 

They just came back from a deployment and were too exhausted to take a shower, so they decided to sit on the wooden bench in front of their base for a little rest.

„It will be so wonderful, Tessa.", Ziva said, planting a kiss on Tessa's head.

„Yes, it will.", Tessa answered, snuggling herself closer against Ziva, entwining their hands.

It was slowly getting dark and cold too, but they just sat there in silence, staring up at the sun going down and the moon taking its place.

„We should probably take a shower and go to sleep, we have to get up early tomorrow.", Tessa murmured, not really interested in letting go of Ziva's hand.

Ziva chuckled silently, the vibration of it bumping against Tessa's head. She straightened her posture, looking at Ziva's now dreamy eyes and noticed that their hands were still strongly entwined.

„You're right, we probably should.", Ziva agreed, not making a move to stand up, just looking at Tessa, one of her hands carefully caressing her cheek, the other one finding its way to Tessa's neck, pulling her closer.

Ziva looked at her with such intensity, Tessa could not restrain herself from kissing her. But it was different this time.

Not careful or slow, with a little doubt turning it into something more bitter than wonderful in the end. This time it was fast, longing, passionate, it reminded her on their first kiss.

After some time she stared at Ziva again, who was not making a secret out of her plan, dragging Tessa by her hand into their base. Tessa followed completely willingly, wanting to continue what they started.

She found herself on that uncomfortable mattress they used to share all the time, Ziva on top of her.

„Do you want this, sweetheart?", Ziva asked, planting an innocent kiss on Tessa's forehead.

„Yes.", Tessa whispered, pulling Ziva down to kiss her properly once again.

„Yes, me too.", Ziva agreed.

When the sun slowly peaked through the small window, Ziva and Tessa were already outside, fulfilling their duties as soldiers. But every now and then a somewhat shy, but still loving smile found their way from one to the other.

The mattress suddenly was not that uncomfortable at all anymore. It was theirs now.

Tessa woke up in cold sweat, immediately getting rid of her hoodie.

She wanted to stand up and take a shower, wash away the dream she had, she remembered that night too well to get rid of it that easily though. Ziva's fingertips tracing her skin was something no amount of water could wash away. She didn't even want that.

You are going to be fine, sweetheart. She missed her so much...

She looked at her phone, deciding that 5am was definitely an okay time to stand up. Sleeping now was not a possibility anyway.