Carved in the Heart

10

It's been weeks since he called me a stumbling block in his life. Since that day, things between us has taken a drastic turn for the worst.

He comes to school and pretends as if he hasn't seen me. He sees me on Campus or during lunch break and doesn't even look my way.
Meanwhile, we sit on the same seat in class and our seat has been pushed to the wall so meaning the only way for me to get to my seat is to pass through the space between his table and chair to get to my seat.

I decided not to pay attention to his recent behavior toward me. Even his friends kept on asking me the same question.

'Why are you with him?' and that is the question I have no answer to myself.

Nowadays, Desmond talks to me only when he wants something or is in need of something. I wonder if time has made it so.

I tried my best to start up a conversation with him, but he shows no interest, he would rather talk to Sherry than me. It is only when we have to go home that I call him out on it but he still reacts some way towards me.

When going home, he still does not talk to me. Olsen has been the one to cheer me up and talk to me when on our way home. I couldn't take the treatment from him but I had to let him know he doesn't bother me.

He takes a different route when we get to where Olsen and Sherry parts way with us. He would rather go with them than me.

It got to a point that I wanted him to go with his mom when she comes to get his siblings but I also knew I would be missing him when he is gone, even as he is by my side I'm still missing him, how much more when he's apart.

Everyday became a living nightmare for me even though I am not asleep. I always wished I never met him, I wished we never had that silent exchange between us. I don't know when or how but I know I've grown something stronger for him.

I don't know what it is but it makes my heart beat faster and harder when he's around me or when I see him from afar. I feel my heart squeeze tighter when he flirts with other girls.

Even though he stops when he thinks I'm not looking at him. I don't know what I did and I don't know what this is, but I don't want to suffer for someone who thinks I'm a stumbling block in his life.

Now almost everyone in school has seen the tension between us. Even though I try to not make it seem so. People keep on asking if everything is alright between us, even my aunt keeps on asking me of his where about and his health, and I keep on responding 'He's fine, he went with his mom.'

I know I'm a strong girl I can handle heart breaks. After all, we will be graduating soon and I might not see him again. I just have to be strong, I told myself as I sat down after evening class today.

'Hi Natalie, sup?' Kevin, a friend of Desmond from his previous school asked.

'Kool, you?'

'Same, but I need maths textbook and Desmond is having one. Since he's not around, can you take it for me?'

'Hmm your friend is not talking to me, I don't want to go into his bag so please take it yourself. You're his friend and he talks to you, he won't be annoyed when he comes.'

'Desmond doesn't allow anyone into his bag apart from you. From the times I've been visiting him here, I realized he allows you into his bag even when he isn't around and comes to find out you went through his things, he doesn't throw a fit and his friends are also saying you are the only one who goes into his bag. Please take it for me.'

'Ok but I don't feel good about this.' I went through his bag and took the book for him, after I went back to writing my homework.

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Love,
Anything gold