Forever Changed

Chapter 9

I woke up to the sound of my alarm. It was time for me to go to school, even though I didn't really want to, but I did miss half of school when I skipped with Kayla and the day after she died. So my parents were making me go. I got up from my bed and got ready for school, to be honest I didn't care about how I looked. So I put on a white t-shirt, jeans, my black vans, and put my hair into a bun. Not really wanting to eat anything I grabbed an apple, my lunch for school and the keys to my moms civics. 

I drove to school and parked in the parking lot. I turned the engine off and took a deep breath. I got out of the car and walked to my locker to get my books and put my lunch in there. Then I heard someone calling my name, I turned around and guess who I saw: Adrian. I turn back around closed my locker and walked but he still kept on calling my name and finally he caught up to me. He grabbed my shoulder and spun me around so that we were face to face. 

"Sarah we need to talk." Adrian said. 

"About?" I said. 

"Us."  

"What's there to talk about?" I said getting annoyed. 

"I didn't mean to take it that far." he said apologetically. 

"But you did. Maybe you didn't want to do it, or maybe it just an excuse so that we can get back together, but I'm not falling for that. When we broke up I cried because I was stupid to like a guy who didn't love me for me but for my body and I'm not going to cry anymore. I've cried so much these past days that I don't have enough tears left in me for you." I said pouring out almost all of my feelings that I kept since the break up.  

"But I do love." he said. 

"No you don't. I didn't even knew love was till after the break up," I said as I blinked back tears. "guess you don't know what have till it's gone."  

"I heard about your sister. I'm sorry." he said looking down. 

"Everyone is but she wasn't the only one that died on that night." with that I left and went to first period.

The bell rang for us to go to lunch. I got up from my seat and went to my locker to grab my lunch. When I got my lunch I went to the courtyard because there was barley anybody in there. I went by a big tree and sat there. I sat there and ate my lunch and let the breeze calm me down. Now I know why Kayla spends most of her time here. It's so relaxing and nice. You can hear the birds chirping and the wind blowing on the grass. I closed my eyes and just relaxed. 

"Hey." said a voice. I opened my eyes and see Alex standing in front of me. 

"Hey." I said. 

"I just wanted to know how your doing?" he asked. 

"I'm fine." I said and looked down wishing he would leave but at the same time I don't want him to leave. Out of nowhere he sat next to me. I looked up into his eyes and he looked at me. Really looked at me, like he can see past the shield I held up. 

"Your not fine. I can tell because your eyes tell me your not." he said and I looked away. 

"Ok I'm not fine. Does that make you happy?" 

"No. I want to help. How can I help?"  

"You know your the only person who said that to me today. Everyone else is saying their sorry and I don't get why their saying sorry, when it clearly my fault that she died." I said. 

"What! It's not your fault. It was an accident. A terrible accident which resulted the death of your sister." 

"Of course it was an accident. I didn't mean to kill her. We fought but I didn't want this. I didn't want her dead." as I said this tears started to weld up in my eyes and one by one tears started dropping from my eyes going down my checks. Next thing I know I'm in Alex's arms crying so hard my head started hurting. Then the bell rang. I got up fixed myself thanked Alex for being there for me, put a fake smile on my face and and went to my class.