Always find me ~ ChanLix

13

Yuri!!! on ice will forever have a special place in my heart. Just putting it out there. It's a must watch anime. And have you guys listened to AKMUs latest album? It's great. Give it a listen. Anyways, sorry for the wait! This is a kinda shorter chapter. Here's your dose of chanlix (even though they haven't really progressed yet). Also, how does one write the sound of a gasp?

——

There were many things Felix feared. There were the usuals like

1. Jump scares

2. Spiders

3. Vsco girls

Then there were his 'deeper' fears. Felix never admitted these to anyone. Not his mom, not his past friends, and definitely not to his band mates at the time.

Felix was afraid of what the future would bring him. He was afraid of what lies behind him in the past. He was afraid of how others saw him. Especially his members. He was terrified of failure, of letting others down. His mother maybe most of all.

She had been with him since day one, and Felix felt nothing but grateful. You could say Felix was being blinded by that fact, even if she hasn't been there for him in the best motherly figuratively way. She was still a figure in his life, and that's what Felix needed. Without a father... a mother was what he needed.

Another fear he had, was being watched by large crowds of people. Or even just a few could freak Felix out. The thought of others watching him intensely, like they're unscrambling his thoughts, it was enough to make Felix's breath hitch. But, when he's dancing, all of that fear would evaporate. That's why him being an Idol would be alright. Dancing and performing would be fine. It was like magic, the way his body would move to the music, like his brain and body would become detached. Nothing could stop him-

"You can't dance your way through life."

Except that. Words said by his mother. She doesn't even know the impact they had on the boy. That was a sentence said to Felix after he got back from Korea. She said it in such a manner that it sounded like a motivational quote or the kind of words a parent says to their kid to cheer them up. That's why they got muddled in Felix's head, and he stopped going to the studio.

When will the day come when Felix can get a break from everything. When he can just be who he is without worrying about others? He just wants to be free from stress. Who knows when this will happen. What we do know, is that in this moment, Felix is feeling the exact opposite.

——

"Hey, it's Felix!"

Felix was unmoving. Your body is always moving no matter how hard you try to still it, but for Felix, he was a statue. No muscle or beat in his body could budge.

All the members turned to see what was happening. Wondering why the music had stopped right in the beginning of their performance.

*Gasp*!

The exasperated breath came from the crowd and the members. The boys just stood still in their places. Standing still with their eyes glued to the almost mystical seeming person in front of them. The scene looked as if they were seeing a ghost or a fictional character in real life.

"Felix." Felix looks immediately at the person who muttered his name.

It was Chan.

"Bangchan."

Almost as if on queue, the floor that Felix was still standing on starts lowering. It was the most painfully slow thing Felix has ever experienced. The sound of the platform lowering was audible enough for it to make the tension in the room turn to awkwardness. Once it was lowered all the way and Felix was out of site, the room remained silent.

"AAAAaAaahHhhhhhh...!" There was a loud yelling coming from underneath the stage. It continues until it reaches beyond everyone's hearing capability.

Confusion is overtaking everyone.

A mic is thrown from the side of the stage to Chan. He looks and finds one of the concert managers frantically waving his arms in indicating Chan to end the concert.

"H-Hi everyone. Uuhhhh. We're going to have to end things here I guess... S-Sorry for the um, inconvenience. Everyone will get a refund of their ticket. Goodnight!" Chan runs off the stage with the members running behind him all baffled.

Once they get backstage, no one dares to say anything. What could they say? No one knew. Well, Hyunjin did.

"What the fuck?!"

Unbeknownst to him, his mic was still on.