Julian De Vizio - The One That Got Away

"Clearly I Was Dispensable To Him" (Part 12)

I desperately grasped at my body. The pain was absolutely excruciating, and it would not go away. Everything hurt, and there was no escape. Though I’d been silly enough to drink myself half to death, thinking that would at least dull the severity of it all. But no amount of alcohol could help me, because my pain wasn’t anywhere on my body, it was all internal. Julian had damaged me, worse than Tim ever could have. This cut deeper than any typical break up, this was pulling me closer to my breaking point, and this was something I wasn’t even sure I could come back from. Terrifying thoughts lingered in my mind. I just wanted Julian to be here, to hold me, and tell me that everything was fine. But I knew that was something I could no longer have; I’d lost that right when I hung up on him the other night. So instead, I washed away every last memory with a bottle of tequila.

Before my mind could play catch up with my hands, I’d dialled Julian’s number and hit call. Somehow it didn’t register that it was 2am.

“Elena?” His voice was tired and strained, I’d woken him up.

The minute I heard him all of my memories came flooding back, and anger erupted inside of me. “Oh, so you still remember my name?”

He sighed, “You’re drunk.”

Who the fuck was he to judge? “And you’re a fucking cunt! But I’m not going around and pointing out the obvious am I?”

“You don’t really mean that do you?” I’d hurt him, perfect, now he could at least begin to understand how I felt.

“A drunk man’s words are a sober one’s thoughts. So fuck you, and fuck off!”

As requested, Julian fucked off.

I couldn’t believe it; he’d actually hung up on me. Tears clouded my eyes as I collapsed onto my bedroom floor. We were so in love, and now look what had become of us. My body began shaking as the alcohol was wearing off. We were over; ‘we’ didn’t even exist anymore. And it was all my fault.

[JULIAN’S POV]

She didn’t love me anymore; she’d made that clear as day. Though I didn’t blame her, because if anyone could take out the world’s worst boyfriend award, that’d be me. My fear of failure had drastically subdued my ability to see what truly mattered; Elena’s feelings. Keeping this secret was my biggest mistake, and if I could, I’d take it all back in a heartbeat. However, going by Elena’s phone call the other morning, I was guessing that I was a little too late. She was done with me. Forever I’d be living with a hole in my heart, but she wanted this, and I owed it to her to respect her wishes.

-DELETE CONTACT?-

“Goodbye Elena, I love you and I hope you find happiness somewhere else, you truly deserve it.”

-CONTACT DELETED-

[ELENA’S POV]

Weeks had past, and nothing. No calls, no messages, no mysterious run-ins, no house visits.  Honestly, I was more offended than upset. I thought he’d fight until his last breath to keep us together. But, clearly I was dispensable to him.

I sighed into the phone. “I guess it was just your typical summer romance.” Sophia had been more than supportive after my harsh break-up with Julian. I appreciated having her by my side through the good and the bad. Because of her, I was finally beginning to get over the whole Julian mess.

“El, turn on channel 7… like right now.”

The instant my screen lit up my body went numb. My phone slipped from my trembling hand and crashed to the floor. A tall, dark and handsome teen was on my television screen auditioning for ‘The X Factor’. He took to the stage with the very song we shared our first kiss to. (*SONG IN SIDEBAR*)

“Julian….?”