Spectrum | ✓

72. Inhibition

❀

The stars look so pretty in the sky
but have you ever wondered about the scalpel so benign?

The scalpel that you know
is the power you hand over,
the power you know is not yours
once you surrender.

I wonder how we think we know it all,
And yet when were in love, nothing makes sense anymore.

I wonder often how people manage
to give up the scalpel,
the scalpel that's a map to their heart,
the very existence of insane to dispel.

I wonder how people can be
so madly in love,
they'd cut themselves over and over
just to remain above.

I wonder at times how love could drive people over the edge,
they always know there's a cliff
and yet drive over the ledge.

I wonder often
if the taste of blood is that fruitful,
against whatever they've been through, against whatever they believe was hurtful.

Perhaps there must be something about the intoxication of love that made people believe otherwise,

maybe that's what made people love the taste of this vice.

I wonder if I could ever hand this scalpel to someone to carve maps and destinies
across my soul,

who knows, maybe this is what I was looking for all along, for someone to carve me whole.

I really wonder whether this is going to end in blood or bloodshed,
either you or me, we're both a cacophony
of so many words unsaid.

If this is the way love makes you implode,
perhaps that's all I want, to become fireworks and explode.

I don't mind you running me over and over,
using the very scalpel I handed you to leave scars to hover.

Maybe that's what I desired to feel all along, to feel your fingers run over me supremely cold,
perhaps I do like the taste of the scalpel, cutting me so rough and so bold.

Is this destruction really
or a detonation set to blast?
Perhaps the answer to this
is somewhere in my past...

There always was a difference between surrendering and letting someone have power over your soul,

to me they were the same until I happened to stumble upon you whole.

When I look at you today, I see no vulnerability when I look at myself into the mirror,
perhaps I know you would never misuse it, you'd never steer.

My heart feels precious every time you caress it with your prune fingers,
maybe that's why I love you so much because the touch of your love always lingers.

I don't know what happens in life ahead, maybe we are together or no,
but if destiny brought us together, there's got to be something more.

If I were to look back
and think back at the past,
the scalpel was something
I could never give up,

until you walked into my life,
one step at a time,
the blade was yours to cup.

Perhaps it's why I'm not scared
to hand you the scalpel today,
knowing full well what it could mean,
I don't mind you leaving back scars to cherish, holding me dear to be seen.

I love you with all my heart, perhaps not as destructive as I thought I could be,
I love you with all my soul and nothing changes that, no matter what storm we see.

I trust you enough to see us shine,
even though we're meant to be stars falling through the sky,
And so I now place the scalpel at your feet;
setting aside my inhibitions,
I'm now willing to try.

❀