South Korea x The Philippines

The Pain, the Sorrow, and the Remembrance of So Many Lives Lost

TW: Some things having to do with suicide. If this triggers you then please don't read if you can't. I'll try not to make it too bad though.
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Maria's Point of View
"Thanks again for taking me out, Ate Malaysia. I had fun." I told my sister who was dropping me off at my house.
"No problem, next time we should invite the whole Asean gang." She said. "Oh Filipina!" She added. "Didn't you borrow one of my scarves a few weeks ago?" She asked.
"Oh yeah, the beige one with those pink flowers. It's in my room, I'll go get it." I said. She closed the door as I ran to my room. "Hey, Yong Soo, can you hand me the beige scarf on our dresser?" I asked opening the door. That was strange, the light was on. I saw the scarf on the dresser. I picked it up and turned. My face paled and my throat grew dry at the sight before my eyes.
A body. A body sprawled out on the floor. (Oh no :0) My legs grew wobbly as I lost my footing, kneeling to the ground. "Y...Yong.." My voice could barely make out.
"Is something wrong Maria?" I heard my sister's footsteps. "What's the matt-" Her voice stopped short. As reality started to flood my mind, a loud yelp exited from my lips.
"Y...Yong Soo!" I shouted, standing up. I rushed to his limp body. My fingers immediately pressing to his neck.
"Maya! Call an ambulance!" I yelled when I felt a pulse. His skin was still warm, but, he was unconscious. I heard a dial tone as I began to look for the reason he was lying on our bedroom floor.
I looked down to his hands. My heart dropped into my stomach as I saw what his fingers were clenched around. A pill bottle.
"Maria, did you find what happened? The police lady is asking." Malaysia said.
"Overdose. Drug Overdose." I said, tears streaming down my face. He tried to kill himself. In his other hand he was grasping a piece of paper. I wiped my eyes and gently tried to grab the paper.

Dear whoever is reading this,
It's probably going to be Maria. I just want to start this letter with one thing. Please, I mean PLEASE, do not blame this on yourself. I couldn't live with myself if you were to blame yourself. Wait, I couldn't live anyway... continuing. Just know that, I love you. I love you so much. You're the one that kept me alive this long. Also, please tell my brothers that I love them. Even North Korea. Don't worry Maria, you'll find someone else. You're beautiful, talented, and you're so nice~ it's a wonder how I kept you for this long. I'm really sorry Maria, it just got to be too much. The pain, the sorrow, the remembrance of so many lives lost. You're probably pissed at me. You probably think I'm a coward. I guess I am. You had to go through so more than me. Please don't hate me. I love you so much! Never forget that!
~ Im Yong Soo, Personification of South Korea
(That letter was so freaking hard to write ;()
"N....No!" I cried. "How could you leave me!" My words slurred as sorrow filled my being. "I could have helped you! I could have mourned with you!" I was an emotional wreck. I felt as if my heart had shattered into a million pieces. I felt somebody pulling me into their arms.
"Shh. It's going to be okay. The ambulance is almost here." Malaysia said softly rubbing my back.
"He killed himself." I cried. I couldn't feel anything except pain and sadness.
"Hey, it's going to be fine. They're going to bring him to the hospital and he's gonna get all fixed up. They're gonna make it all better." She said.
"B...but what about my Yong Soo?" I asked, my voice was calmer. My head was resting on her shoulder as she whispered words of encouragement in my ear.
"Yong Soo is going to be fine. We'll find someone he can talk to." She said. I was disrupted from my thoughts as the door bell rang. "I'll get it." Malaysia said. Multiple men walked into my house. My mind was blank as they rolled him out on a stretcher. A lady who was a part of the team asked if I wanted to come with them. I weakly nodded as Malaysia grabbed my hand and supported me, helping me into the ambulance.
When we got to the ER, it still barely felt real.
They placed him in a room and asked if I wanted to sleep on the couch. I nodded and waited as they took care of him. Malaysia eventually had to go. Sleep took over my body as I could barely see them wheeling him back in.

~~~~The Next Morning :D

My eyes fluttered open as I tried to understand where I was. My head was pounding and I looked up to see a softly snoring Yong Soo. My heart raced as I ran to his side taking in everything that was attached to him. The heart monitor was displaying his heart rate. An oxygen mask was attached to his face. And an IV was inserted into the inside of his right elbow. A smile formed on my face as I laughed happily. He was alive! A nurse ran in and checked his blood pressure, then she ran out. I ran my fingers through his hair and traced is facial features. My eyes focused back on him when I heard a soft moan. My hand grasped his left hand and squeezed it firmly.
"M...Maria?" A small voice asked. He tried to shrug off the mask, I helped him take it off. I tried not to cry as happiness flooded my system.
"Yong Soo!" I exclaimed a bright smile on my face.
"...It didn't work...?" He asked, traces of sadness in his voice. My face fell and I let go of his hand. I didn't know how to feel, angry or sad?
"Like hell it didn't." I spat. "You really think I'd let you leave me like that? After a normal morning I come home and find you dying on the floor. Then I find out you freaking overdosed on pills. T...then I find your note..." My eyes turn glassy, my breathing hitched as tears began to stream down my face. "W..What do you have to say for yourself?" I asked, my words unclear.
"I...I honestly didn't think it would affect you this much..." He said. (What?!? Oh No!) Pain struck my heart.... he thought I didn't care about him?
"Y...You don't think I love you?" I asked shocked. He tried his best to look away from me. "Y..Yong Soo... if I didn't love you... do you think I would tell you that I did every night as I'd curl up in your arms. You know you're the only person I've willingly opened up to and have gotten that intimate with. Don't forget every morning, when we're both rushing to the door to get to work, I always find time to tell you then right? I'm sorry if I'm a bad girlfriend and that I don't treat you pro-" He cut me off.
"That's not it at all... You're wonderful."
"Then why the hell would you think I wouldn't care?"
"It just... seemed to good to be true. You were just so nice to me and everything...that I might have thought you were cheating on me." He said sheepishly.
"Yong Soo." I sighed. "I don't have reason to cheat on you. And we both know that you'd find out if I did." I said.
"Yeah..."
"Okay. One last question before I crawl into that bed with you, why did you try to kill yourself?" (Yong Soo :() I asked softly. "The pain, the sorrow, the remembrance of so many lives lost... that's really not a good enough explanation for me." I said. My hand found his and squeezed it tightly.
"Well... I'm a young country I guess it takes awhile for countries to learn how to live with what they've done... and what's been done to them. It's like I can still hear them crying..." (:()
"You could have asked me... I've certainly felt the same way. I could've helped you..." I said.
"I know that now... I just want to let you know I'm really sorry. It was a foolish thing of me to resort to this. I promise I'll come to you first before making any rash decisions." He said. He then held the covers up and gestured for me to join him. I crawled in and curled into his side, intertwining our legs. My arms wrapped around his middle as my cheek was pressed to his chest. A content warmth filed my body as I could feel my self drifting off to sleep.
"Goodnight Yong Soo." I said.
"But it's morning."
"You're warm, I'm cold, I'm tired, it's nighttime." I said.
"Goodnight Maria." He said pulling me closer to him.
"I love you and I mean it." I said, sleep slurring my words.
"I love you too." He said pressing a kiss to my forehead.
~~~~~~~~
The feels in this story though.
Okay here is my little speech (ahem)

If you're suicidal or you have depression. Don't think that nobody cares, that no one has gone through what you have, or that no one can help you. That is basically the moral of this one shot. Also, always feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. I can probably help you since I've gone through this before. Please?