Stargirl

38

The two months and eight days that Hendrix was in our like were some of the very best days. Of course, there were long nights, lots of naps, and a lot of love.

He looked more and more like Ryder every day and his favorite person right now was definitely his daddy.

Before I gave birth to Hendrix, I always thought my top-priority (other than him) would be getting the baby weight off. Being a model, it was understandable since my boy was my job.

But then Hendrix got here and everything changed.

I did exercise every now and then from my sanity and to destress. Almost every evening we would walk around the neighborhood or park with Rex and Hendrix. It was a tradition that I looked forward to, especially as Hendrix got older.

It was August and we were quickly approaching the time of year that was so much fun with a new family member - the holiday season. I couldn't wait to take him to the pumpkin patch, dress him up for Halloween, and take family Christmas pictures.

But the holiday season meant something else for models.

Fashion week, fashion shows, and lots of eating rights.

And I knew it was time to face the truth, I was not going to be ready. My body wasn't ready, my mind wasn't, and I couldn't leave for three weeks with a baby at home.

I stared in the floor-length mirror wearing a comfy top from Lululemon and leggings also from Lululemon - it was my go-to outfit nowadays.

I looked at myself from the side, yeah it's definitely not happening.

"Holly," Ryder's voice started as he walked into the room, "Hendrix is still asleep, surprisingly. Why are you looking at yourself like that?"

I turned to him, "Fashion week is next month and the VS fashion show is in November. I'm not ready, you know?"

"Holland, you've been doing this for over five years. You can take a break, you need to. Taking one year off isn't going to hurt you." Ryder advised as he sat on the bench that was in front of our bed

I nodded as I brushed my hair, "Yeah. I think that I want to use the next two, three years to build my clothing brand while modeling and then when Hendrix is three or about to turn three, I want another baby."

I looked to see Ryder's reaction and he looked pleased.

"Can't wait for our two boys." he joked

"You're so funny." I spoke sarcastically, "Everyone is coming over at two."

We invited over both of our families to celebrate the end of summer with a pool party. So many things happened over the summer that we need to celebrate.

I had Hendrix, my brother's got drafted to the NFL (Jack to the Los Angeles Rams and Finn to the Los Angeles Chargers - we had a nice laugh about it), and lots of wedding anniversaries.

"We should probably get ready while we can." And just as Ryder said that the baby montor alerted us that Hendrix was moving

Ryder let out a small laugh, "Kids."

"I'll go take care of him and you can get ready." Ryder stood up

I gave him a kiss, "Thank you, I love you."

"I love you more." he smiled before walking out of the room

As I walked into our bedroom, I stared at the evolution of us pictures on the wall. The first one is from when I was fifteen and Ryder was nineteen, us again when I first moved to NYC, our first wave of dating, then the second, engagement pictures, wedding pictures, a few years alone, and then the family picture we took when Hendrix was three weeks old.