My heart feels heavy and my smiles hurt
I cant end the pain either because then someone else will too
I'm stuck in this endless cycle of loathing and I cannot leave no matter which way I go
I dont have anyone anymore
And that hurts the worst
Because before I thought I did
Before I thought I could trust a few, but now I know I cant
So forgive me if I seem a bit chilly
I've made myself cold because my warm was too hot
It is "You care too much", not "he shouldnt have hit you"
It is "You always take everything", not, "what is it that you need"
It is "But you only have one dad", not, "He hurt you and you are allowed to be angry"
It is "You sleep everywhere", not, "why are you so tired"
It is "You lie too much", not, "Why are you scared of saying the truth"
It is "You are so weak", not, "Why are you crying"
It is "Stop being dramatic", not, "tell me what's wrong"
I've made myself cold, because my fire burned too much for them to handle
I've stopped feeling too much now
The noise is quieter
But my thoughts are darker
Faking happiness is a lot harder this way
I couldnt pretend to care when I didnt and somehow no one noticed
So
My heart feels heavy and my smiles hurt
YOU ARE READING
Lost In My Head
Puisi"This is something that I hope no one will ever see, because this one thing..... Just this once, I wish to treasure for only me" ★★★★★★★★★★★★★★ A book of poetry and prose, and the general musings of my fucked up mind
