Regiphobia

The Freedom

Goda smiled up at Gabe, trying to make it look less forced than it was. The latter had his hand on his cheek, meeting his eyes as he pulled away from the kiss that had been held just a moment before.

"Stay safe, doll, I'll be gone just a week. I'll call you every day, promise," he said softly. The second part of that had sounded less like a promise and more like a reminder. He would call every day, and if Goda didn't respond or if he'd been doing something wrong, he'd be angry.

"I kn-know. I'll see you on Sunday," Goda said back, voice practically a whisper, "I love you."

"I love you too, my dear."

And with that, Gabe stepped away and made his way over to the private jet sitting at the ready on the runway. He went up the stairs, waving back one more time to Goda, who waved in return.

He took in a breath as it ascended, not saying a word. A few minutes later and he was escorted back to the car, a guard sitting beside him.

He stayed silent until he got back inside the castle, where he mumbled a thank you to the guard beside him and started up to his room. He had left a note before he went to see Gabe off, and he was filled with excitement immediately. He pulled open his bedroom door, walking inside. He couldn't wipe the smile off his face, especially as he saw Juan sitting on the edge of the bed.

As soon as Goda shut the door behind him, Juan was on his feet. He pulled him into a kiss, wrapping his arms around his waist. Goda let his crutches fall to the floor as he put his hands on Juan's shoulders. They leaned into one another, not wanting to break apart. They had a full week, they weren't in any rush.

As soon as Goda did pull away, he could see just how wide Juan's smile was. The other lifted a hand to rest it on his cheek, green eyes filled with glee.

"You said he's gone until next Sunday?" Juan said. When Goda nodded, he kissed him again, just for a moment this time. "A whole week where we're not hiding from him- this is amazing!"

"Y-Yeah," Goda smiled up at him, "We just we have to stay away f-from cameras."

"That won't be hard, don't worry," Juan pulled Goda flush against his chest, "That man is like some kinda hawk on you, y'know."

"He's just p-protective," Goda said quickly, restating the excuse he'd been using for the past three years now.

"Yeah, I know, you've told me," Juan said, a flash of worry hitting his face as he shook off the thoughts about the King that had been tormenting him.

"C-Can we not focus on that? I just... I want to be here. I want to be with you."

Juan nodded, kissing his cheek before saying, "I just realized, if you want me to, I could stay the night with you."

Goda's eyes lit up, "You could? You would?"

"Of course! I'd do anything to spend more time with you, Goda," he assured. Goda flushed slightly, resting his head on the other's chest. Juan chuckled, holding him.

He knew they'd be able to do whatever they wanted, as long as they were alone in a room without a camera. He knew this would probably be either the best or the worst week for them. He knew his brother would be annoyed to hell and back. He knew so many things, but when it came to the boy in front of him, he had no idea. He felt completely in the dark, despite spending so much time with him over the past month.

"So, how do you want to start this amazing week?" Juan asked.

Goda thought for a moment before his whole face lit up, "Oh! There's someth-thing I wanna show you! We just have to g-get to my study, just pretend you're guarding me!"

"Alright, lead the way," Juan grinned, just happy that Goda was happy.

Goda picked his crutches back up, heading out of the room and to the elevator. It wasn't long until they ended up in his study. He made his way to his desk, sifting through some of his papers, "I've b-been working on this. It's not quite done, I have some c-coloring to do, but I thought you'd like it!"

"What is it?" Juan asked making his way over and glancing over the other's shoulder. His eyes widened in surprise and awe as he looked at the paper.

It was just a pencil drawing, but the skill of the drawing was incredible. As Goda held the paper out to him, he was genuinely hesitant to take it, scared to mess it up. He just looked down it, speechless.

"D-Do... you like it?" Goda asked, seeming incredibly nervous.

"Like it? Goda, this is amazing!" a smile spread back over his cheeks.

On the paper was him. It was only half-colored, but it felt like if he made the pose and the face, he'd be looking in a mirror.

"How long have you been working on this? How long have you been doing art? This is incredible!" he enthused. When he looked back to Goda, the other... had tears in his eyes? "Are you OK? Did I say something?"

"N-No, not at all, I just- No one's ever said something so nice ab-bout my art before," Goda mumbled, a shaky smile on his face as he quickly wiped at his face, "Th-Thank you, I worked really hard on it. I've been working on it for a c-couple weeks, and I've been drawing since I could hold a c-crayon."

Juan was still slightly put off by the near-tears state Goda had been in. Weren't tears for when you were sad or hurt? It didn't make sense to him, but he brushed it off, "It's so amazing, I genuinely don't know what to say- I mean, this drawing is better looking than I am!"

Goda giggled quietly before stretching to give the other a kiss on the cheek, "I th-think you're about even, maybe a little better."

"Lies," Juan grinned, setting the paper back on Goda's desk and running a hand through the other's strawberry hair. They looked into each other's eyes, both immediately able to recognize the emotion reflected in them.

"You're incredible, Goda," Juan breathed out, moving his hand to caress his cheek.

"I'm really not," Goda let out a nervous laugh.

"Who got that idea in your head?" Juan's voice was quiet, warm, loving, but concerned, "Look at what you just made! It's absolutely gorgeous, and here you are, putting yourself down. I wish you could see what I saw in you."

Goda looked away as the other spoke, but Juan guided his gaze back to his emerald eyes, "Come on. I know there has to be at least one thing you can say about yourself that isn't negative."

"...I mean, I'm g-good at daydreaming in a lot of detail, I guess," Goda shrugged.

Juan lit up, "Hey, it's something! That's a start!"

Goda nodded, but his own mind was chastising him already. Juan pulled him into a kiss, which did help him in ignoring that critical voice. He focused on the feeling of Juan's arms pressing lightly against his sides. He focused on the pressure on his lips, the beating of his heart, the quiet sounds outside the room, anything but the insults shot from inside his own head.