HTGAB101 :: changlix ✔︎

step 24- tuesgay

Step Twenty Four: Let your eyes do all the work for you! Not literally, of course, but your eyes can convey tons of emotions and things that words can't even start explaining!

After waking up in my own bed—Changbin and I felt awkward about sharing one last night, for some reason—the first thing that registers in my mind is not the fact that I am no longer single.

It's stress.

The talent show is tomorrow; I've managed to procrastinate long enough. And, yes, Changbin did say he'd help me, but the guy can only do so much. He's amazing, sure, but this is my responsibility.

Plus, I think he'd just distract me.
(read: "sexy biceps")

The pancakes are already on a plate when I reach the kitchen. Changbin woke up... I don't know when, actually, but it had to have happened before I woke up. Like, duh. Felix, focus! I think, squeezing my eyes shut. No time for your stupid shenanigans.

They're dry as hell; I'm not sure even the maple syrup can save them. The pancakes, I mean. My shenanigans aren't dry at all.

Not in that way.

Which way?

I give up.

Even if I were to want to, I wouldn't be able to pour maple syrup on my shenanigans.

Unless...

No.

"So, Move," Changbin says, picking at his stack of pancakes. "How about after school today, we go somewhere? Or we can come back here to work on it, in one of the empty rooms."

I nod, not betraying to him how nervous I am.

Practicing is fine.

Practicing a performance I've never practiced before is fine.

Practicing a performance I've never practiced before, the day before I need to perform it, is... quite stressful.

Practicing a performance I've never practiced before, the day before I need to perform it, in front of my boyfriend, is somehow even more stressful.

Practicing a performance I've never practiced before, the day before I need to perform it, in front of my boyfriend, who has "sexy biceps" and the sweetest existence?

I guess I can try...

>>><><<<

School is a blur. Changbin and I have to continuously reintroduce ourselves as a couple; I quite enjoy it, actually.

Kim Yasoo is super opinionated, so we steer clear of her. For some reason, it's like she has faded away. Not important. That's what you get for being a female dog.

At some point—well, lunchtime, to be more precise—Seungmin frowns and slides a few bills across the table at which we're seated, bills that Hyunjin snatches with glee. "Told you it'd happen before my birthday," the now-slightly-richer boy gloats.

Seungmin only glares at Changbin and me. "You couldn't have been oblivious just a month or so longer?" I suppose Seungmin is still lamenting the loss of his precious money. Same, Seungmin.

Stupidly, Jisung also gloats, but for different stupid reasons than Hyunjin. He's stupidly under the stupid impression that he stupidly caused this not-so-stupid relationship by his stupid contact name that stupid Siri was stupidly able to identify not-so-stupid Changbin by.

Alas, as fun as the school day is, there's nothing worth mentioning aside from those few, brief moments.

As we walk off school grounds, Changbin turns to me.

"Hey, Lixie, I was talking to Chan earlier, and he told me about this place we could practice. It's just a small, simple studio, but he says that it's actually quite nice. He gave me the key and the address, so—"

Changbin shuts up when I intertwine our fingers, swinging our hands back and forth as we walk. "Sounds good, Binnie. Lead the way."

>>><><<<

I want to rip my hair out of my scalp and set it on fire.

Yes, that escalated quickly, but this dance is hard; this song is hard; Lee Taemin must be some kind of higher being in order to pull this off.

Still, I try. I really do, and I think it's evident by my shaky voice and sweating neck. Changbin offers me a smile and a water bottle, his eyes reflecting step twenty four.

What I see in his gaze is, for the most part, admiration. We both know I'm working hard, here, and he respects the way I haven't stopped. It's been three hours. If I dig deeper, I do see the feelings he has for me. They've been there a while; I just haven't noticed.

"How about you rest for, like, ten minutes? Or more."

I only nod and fall to the floor, completely spent. "What if," I wheeze between breaths, "I just took out a few of the elements that need polishing. Like that part where I do the spin thing and flick my chin at the audience? Why spin? I can just rotate my torso, and it'd probably have the same effect."

Changbin sits down next to me and pats my shoulder. I sit back up, and he puts an arm around my waist. "Your choice, Lixie. I'm only here to make sure you don't collapse."

"I've already collapsed."

"I'm only here to make sure you don't collapse again," he corrects himself with a grin. "It's my duty as your boyfriend."

"But you would do it either way."

"Yeah, I probably would."

"So I'm not getting a particularly special treatment right now?"

Changbin glances down at his hand, which is pressed against my side, and raises an eyebrow.

I smile, sheepish. "Okay, yeah."

We spend the remaining time of my break in silence, Changbin eventually reaching up to mess with some tiny, stray strand of hair on my head.

"Okay, up you go," Changbin mutters, hoisting me back up to my feet. I whine and complain, but ultimately comply with his orders. "Now, go from the beginning, and see if there's anything you want to change."

I dance, sing, and move through Move, my voice coming out clear after the much-needed respite. At some point, I glance back and see Changbin's undisguised stare.

Oh, yikes.

"Lix," he says once I'm done, glancing, for just a moment, down at my shirt, which is sticking to my skin, "you're incredible. I don't see anything that needs to be Changbin."

What? I think. Likewise, I say, "What?"

"What?"

"'Anything that needs to be Changbin?'"

He cringes, realizing what happened. "Anything that needs to be changed," he corrects himself.

I decide to randomly be bold and delicately place my arms over Changbin's shoulders, lightly hanging off his neck. "You want to know something?" I whisper, purposefully making my voice huskier as I smirk up at Changbin through half-lidded eyes.

No, no. I'm already cringing at myself.

He shivers. "Mm?"

"Something does need to be changed."

On my second day of dating Changbin, I run a finger along his abdomen, tracing the lines of his skin as I put my forehead against his.

ABORT. ABORT. ABORT.

"I need a change of clothes, otherwise I'll stink."

And then, in Changbin's eyes, I see frustrated annoyance.

He can wait; night isn't so far as he thinks.