Linkguistics

Part 20: Vah Medohn't

The grand and strange tale where trusting a Malicious and suspicious Link would have been a good thing continues. Vah Medoh should have been nothing more than annoying. It is a little more than that.

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Link flinched as the ghostly voice of Revali started to speak. "Well now, I've seen that face before..." The disembodied voice was not half as ruffled as Link thought it would sound. Some notes of the restrained anger started to surface at this point, "I had a feeling you would show up eventually. Why'd you wait a hundred years to come here and gloat about your victory?"

"Not my victory yet. I need to kill Ganon again. Got to get Divine Beast free."

"YOUR BLASTED CREATURE MURDERED ME AND YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO-"

Link sighed to himself and realized the experimental beeswax earplugs were useless in the face of Revali's volume. He drew the Master Sword and proceeded into the belly of the flying machine. Link had no intention of prematurely using the Champions' abilities and so ignored Revali's creative suggestions on various ways to die.

Link didn't notice the usual pattern of Divine Beast conquest was about to be interrupted due to Revali's distractions. With the other three Divine Beasts, the Blights waited to see if visitors would die on their own. Blights weren't very bright and thought it would be a good idea to wait until people were activating the last terminal to slaughter them. Their bulk made materializing in smaller spaces tricky. They also liked to relax and bask in their century-long assumed victory. Keeping constant vigilance up was not high priority when people didn't have Sheikah Slates on them and couldn't activate terminals to tamper with stuff.

As Link reached the first terminal and obtained the map, Revali's yelling and insults continued. Link suspected, and had confirmed using several weeks worth of short interviews punctuated by thunder and laser reflections, that Daruk hadn't been able to chat with Mipha until after the Fireblight was slain.

The Windblight had heard Revali's yelling and it got curious. Revali hadn't yelled this much for the past decade. Both Link and Revali didn't see the swirls outside. Link was gliding down towards a wing vent and then...

"SCREEEEEEEEEEE!"

Link collapsed the paraglider a split second too late. A blast of plasma knocked him clear of the wingtip and into the open sky.

"What?! It's actually trying to kill you?!"

Link screamed back as he was trying to operate the Sheikah Slate while in freefall. "Yes!"

"Why?!"

"I kill Ganon!"

"SCREEEEEEEEE!"

Link fumbled and pressed the transport rune to get back onto Vah Medoh before he became a rain of ashes on the Hebra Mountains. The Windblight looked in confusion at the spot where Link had been as Link reappeared on the landing pad. Link hobbled into the machine as he chugged an elixir. Unfortunately for him the Windblight caught on fast and reappeared by a window. Link was forced to duck and cover as a barrage of shots came in through the window.

"Aren't you Ganon?! That thing is one of Ganon's own servants and-"

"Help if you talk please!" Link prepared a round of Urbosa's Fury and hoped it could stun the thing floating outside the window. He needed to get to a nice and open battle arena. It was looking more and more likely that Mipha was going to be needed.

"That thing plays dirty! If you could stun it somehow you might be able to get to the main terminal. Why are you wasting your time on a short range weapon when you can't even reach it from here?!"

Revali hadn't manifested so no one was able to see his jaw drop as Urbosa appeared to smite the Blight. Urbosa only managed a few words. "Knowing more about attack-"

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Revali hadn't expected to see all of his fellow champions in this mortal coil. He would never have, in his wildest dreams, pictured them returning in this manner. He knew they had to be the true force responsible for freeing Vah Medoh.

He manifested above a battered Link and peered down at him. "Why, Mipha, Daruk, and Urbosa saved your sorry hide. You can't claim this victory. That was sloppy. You would have expired right then and there if it weren't for her grace, you know." Revali didn't know about the four remaining fairies, twelve different appetizing hearty meals, attack boost skewers, and bomb arrows which Link still had in reserve.

Link was, thankfully, too polite to make certain gestures at this bird. "Mipha is amazing," acknowledged Link. Link wondered about which rice bowl he should celebrate with. First he had to take care of the Divine Beast. He held the slate to the control terminal.

"I can't believe how... lucky you are."

Was that an almost compliment? Link thought. He hummed noncommittally as he rebooted the SheikahOS. It didn't help that Revali was adding new words to the unfamiliar vocabulary list.

"Your ineptitude nearly cost you your life. Since this whole mess is your fault, you're going to need to go and fix it. I cannot believe you of all people managed to show up here... What?! Urbosa, you can't..." Link didn't hear what the other spirits were saying since he wasn't calling on their gifts. He could only guess. "...Hey, he would have died without you and the reason I died is only because I was winging it. Stop laughing! That isn't funny." Link listened to Revali grow more flustered and many of the sentences were impossible to puzzle out for a non-native modern-language speaker.

It was after Link finished the reboot and picked a victory steak that he heard Revali yelling. "All right, all right! FINE. But only because Mipha requested it... Link!"

Link stopped mid-chew.

"Put that steak away and listen, moron."

Link considered ignoring that order then decided against it. The other Champions probably would not approve of stooping to Revali's level.

"Since, in our absence, Hyrule has lost any semblance of competent and skilled warriors, we'll need some idiot reckless enough to charge in and..." He started muttering to someone Link could not see. Revali sighed deeply and dragged his wings/hands down is face in an universal expression of annoyance. "I can't believe I'm actually saying this. This is the sacred skill that I have dubbed Revali's Gale!" Link was caught off guard by the orb of power that flew into his chest while he was wondering if Revali was actually more of a drama queen than Kohga. The blast of wind flung Link into the terminal.

"HEY. Tha twa sunc alle dfory ouje rk!"

"Whatever you said, It was probably irrelevant. Next time pay attention when using Revali's Gale. It's now time to move on and make preparations for Medoh's strike on Ganon. Feel free to thank me now."

Link didn't.

Revali rolled his eyes. "Never mind. Just go."

Link did.