Forever and a Day

CHAPTER 9

            Lawrence and I were still sitting on the same secluded school bench until the last five minutes of school. My head was leant against his shoulder and his arm was slung around me. My sobbing and weeping have subsided now and all that’s left are red, puffy eyes and the hurt from my heart. It was nice to know that I had Lawrence who’s maybe annoying as fuck, but won’t judge me. He kept silent when I did which meant he really understood what I feel. It made me wonder if he ever got dumped before.

A couple of minutes later, the dismissal bell rang and he stood up abruptly as if he was ashamed of being seen with me. I looked at him eerily and he sighed wanting to let out a reasonable explanation but looked away instead. “Do you want a ride home… or?” He asked uncomfortably. “I prefer walking. But thanks for the offer though,” I said appreciatively. “Okay then. If that’s what you prefer,” and without a goodbye of some sort, he walked away, leaving me. What was up with that boy? When we were alone he was the sweetest, most understanding bad boy but when others can see him, he’s an ass. Confusing as it is, I’ll just leave it. After all, I already know another side of him.

I was already starting my not-so-long walk home when I saw Patrick Williams. He was kind of Jake’s best friend. He was a school heartthrob. He’s also a looker and a football player; chicks dig boys like that. Good and bad at the same time. It really depends on how much you know him. Yes, he can also be a jerk, but what can we do? He’s a boy. He caught me staring at him and started walking towards me. I was starting to walk away, avoiding the awkward conversation. Even though he was Jake’s best friend, we were never really that close. I took a quick glance at him and he still saw that and waved his arms so I had no choice but to stop. I waited for him to get to me while looking down the ground, there was no way I was looking at him in the eye… not when Jake and I aren’t ‘okay’. “Hey, Zo,” He greeted me but I still didn’t speak. What was I supposed to say? “You mind if I asked you a question?” He asked me casually. Wow, how can he not sound awkward? He has pretty mean social skills. “Uh, sure,” I said biting my lip. Good thing the ground doesn’t have eyes or this will be more awkward for me than it already is.

“About you and Jake,” He started. “Can I go now?” I said as walked off. Well, of course he didn’t let me off the hook that easy. “Wait, okay?” He said gently as he held my wrist. “Jake didn’t want to kiss Alice. Alice forced her,” He explained manly. “I saw him kiss her back,” I said fighting back the tears that were now threatening to fall. “Look, I’m a boy, he’s a boy. Even if we love someone so much, we still won’t be able to help our…” He didn’t finish his sentence. He seemed to be searching for the right words. “Manly instinct,” He continued. “He still kissed her back,” My voice quivered and it made it obvious that I was on the verge of crying. “I’m having a nice view of your hair right now. It would be nice if you look at me,” Patrick said jokingly. I knew he understood the quiver of my voice and he didn’t want to make me cry. But what good is a joke to me if he brings up topics like this?

I looked up at him and I didn’t know what expression to show. “That’s better,” He said as he let out a smile. “Like I said, he’s a boy. And boys have weaknesses over girls even if they have another girl,” He explained. “It’s kind of like that,” He continued. I can now hear a little awkwardness in his voice. “I…” I pretended like I had something to say even though I really don’t. “You should give him a chance. He really loves you, Zoe,” He said as he looked me in the eyes sincerely. “Look, it’s disturbing to see my best friend like that. Jake’s depressed as fuck. He won’t eat, he won’t do anything fun and coach’s even threatening to replace him as the quarterback…” He looked away in disapproval. Patrick was staring at the direction of the football field where he should be right now. “He’s getting nailed out there. Even the freshmen can pin him down,” He pouted and looked at me. “Hey, are you even listening? It’s like I’m talking to the wind here,” He was irritated now. I haven’t seen Patrick be irritated until now.