What the fuck is wrong with me?

One

Harry's Pov

I could feel myself getting sadder by the second. My cheeks were burning red hot and my eyes were quickly filling with tears. I couldn't take pretending anymore but obviously I didn't want to break in front of the guys, they'd think I'm pathetic. The conversation happening in front of me had become murmurs, I was too stuck in my own head to pay attention. So to avoid anyone asking you alright? I got up off the sofa and dashed up the stairs before locking myself in my room, practically collapsing on the floor in hysterics. Sometimes I'm good at pretending everything's alright but sometimes I can't help it showing.

Simon's Pov

I loved hanging out with my friends, it was always so much fun and we'd always be laughing. I thought we were all having fun right now until I noticed Harry. He was sat with both his hands covering half his face whilst staring blankly at the floor below him, his cheeks were bright pink so I assumed he was near tears. My mouth opened to question him about it but before I could speak and ask you alright? he'd already jumped up from the sofa and rushed upstairs. That was strange I mean he does get like this sometimes quiet I mean and not following the conversation but he really looked like he was going to cry. Maybe I was just overthinking it or reading too much into it. Yeah it's probably just a one off things. "Simonnn?" Josh clicked his fingers in front of my face, startling me and taking me away from my thoughts and back to the conversation we were all having "Soo? Do you like the hide and seek idea?"
"Yeah yeah it's good definitely put it on the list!" I looked towards Jj after I'd finished speaking to Josh, and he was already staring back at me. "Talk?" he mouthed and I nodded before following him into the hallway. Wonder what this is about.

Jj's Pov

This was happening far too often, poor Boggo looked broken and I was clueless on how to help. I diverted my eyes towards Simon; who was sat opposite me on the other sofa, and to my surprise he was staring at Harry and he looked like he was about to say something but then Harry dashed off up the stairs. I continued looking at Simon so I could catch his attention once he looked my way and after about 30 seconds, he did. "Talk?" I mouthed.
Once we'd reached the hallway and I was sure we were out of listening range from the other guys I spoke "Si it's well it's-," I stuttered whilst I spoke as I didn't know how to say everything that was on my mind.
"Is it about Harry?" Simon interrupted.
"Yeah, do you think he's okay I mean we both noticed just now and I've seen him do the same thing a before and uhh I've always brushed it off as nothing and..and but now I'm not so sure" shit I'm rambling
Simons face changed, he looked concerned "You've seen him do this before?"
I nodded,
"Shit."

Simon's Pov

Shit is right, I'm completely worried! What's wrong with Harry?

*time skip to a few hours later*

It was now around 3am and I couldn't sleep, I was stressed out and all that was racing through my mind was is he okay? is he just having a moment? are we just overreacting or is this serious? All I was doing was tossing and turning in my sheets until I decided that splashing my face with some cold water would be a good idea and a good distraction for the few minutes it would take me to complete the task. I stood up and started to walk towards my bathroom and with each step I took, a once faint cry got slightly louder and louder. After today I was thinking it was probably Harry, I completely scrapped the idea of splashing water on my face, that could wait because honestly, investigating this was way more important. My hands started to clam up as I stepped out onto the landing, my eyes scanned every one of the guys' bedroom doors just to make sure until they stopped on Harry's, like I had guessed. Would I want him to come into my room if he'd heard me crying? I asked myself and the answer was yes, of course I would. With that in mind, I power walked across the landing and began turning his doorknob. "Bog?" I whispered as I stepped into his pitch black room, he didn't answer only his cries became stronger. "Bog?" I sat down next to him on his bed, still no reply but he grabbed me and hugged me tightly like a pillow, I didn't mind. His cries eventually calmed down though he still didn't let go and oddly, I still didn't mind because at this point I was hugging him back too.
I don't wanna leave him.