Just Breathe

t w e n t y - o n e

Remus

When I woke up, I was immediately aware of a burning pain in my chest. I sat up in a panic to find that Sirius wasn't there, which only worsened my panic. But then I heard something clattering in the kitchen and I calmed down, realizing that Sirius must've gotten up to make breakfast or something. 

I unhooked my G-tube and crawled out of bed, wincing as I went. My lungs constricted painfully with each breath and I was shaking slightly, both with the pain and the nerves of what it meant. At that point, I was running off the logic that maybe if I ignored it, it would go away. 

With shaking hands, I looped my nasal cannula under my nose and pulled on a sweater. I had to grab the door frame on my way out and I inched my way to the kitchen where Sirius was standing frying eggs. 

"Hey babe, you want some eggs?" The smell hit me and I gagged, feeling nauseous all of a sudden. 

"No thanks," I said quietly, rubbing my chest to try and ease the pain there. I sat down at the counter and pulled my pills over to me, taking them as fast as my sore throat would allow. 

Sirius frowned, immediately on high alert.

"You're shaking," he noted. "Remus, are you alright? Honestly?"

My face felt hot and flushed. "M'fine, Sirius. Just..." I couldn't think of an excuse, so I didn't say anything at all. Sirius came over to me, eggs forgotten. He reached out a hand and felt my forehead. His frown deepened. 

"Remus, you're burning up, we should go to the hospital."

My veins seemed to freeze up in my body and I started coughing, struggling to suck in enough air. 

"No..." I pleaded. 

Sirius gave me a stern look. "Do you need something to drink? Here, let me get you a glass of water."

I felt like I had something to prove to him. I struggled to stand, immediately regretting it as blood pounded in my head and my legs shook. 

"I'll get it myself," I said, rounding the counter to get at the sink. Sirius huffed in frustration and went over to the stove. 

"Damn it, I burnt the eggs," he said, turning off the stove and setting the pan, eggs and all, in the sink, deciding that it wasn't worth another go. 

I hadn't yet made it to the sink when another wave of dizziness hit me and I careened to the side, catching myself on the edge of the counter. 

There was a ringing in my ears. 

"Rey! Remus! Remus, tell me what's wrong! Are you okay?"

It took me a minute to realize that it was Sirius fretting about me, holding me up by my shoulders. 

I suddenly felt like I was going to cry, all the fear catching up to the pain. "No," I whimpered.

My hands and feet were numb, a tingly sensation spreading through my limbs. My lungs felt that way too, except like it was a sharp, stabbing pain there rather than little needles. 

My vision started to blur and I met Sirius's eyes before my knees gave out, too weak to hold me up anymore. 

*******

Sirius

I let out a cry of surprise as Remus's knees gave out. He whimpered when I caught him, eyes rolling back in his head. 

I was breathing in short panicky gasps. I didn't know what to do. 

What would Lily do, what would Lily do, what would Lily do?