Irondad and Spiderson One Shots

Lonely

T.W- Depression

(Third person P.O.V)

Peter felt alone. Sure he was surrounded by people but he felt like a ghost. Like when he is needed they notice him, but as soon as he needs someone they are gone. Vanished. 

He always tried his best to make people happy, make sure they didn't feel the way he did. His thoughts were plagued with pain and hell fire, raging furnaces that would never let up, never let hm forget. 

No matter what happens Peter blames himself, always apologising, just trying his best to make people happy. 

He didn't have anyone any more, May was always busy, Tony died saving the world. But in the process Peter's world was destroyed. Ned was there sure, but Peter couldn't burden him with how he felt, he couldn't do that to anyone. 

So he suffers in silence, like thousands. Hopelessness sets in, and soon he knows he can't be saved. It's like something settled into his mind and made the choice that he can't be saved, and he accepted it. He always felt like he wasn't good enough for anyone, no matter what he was never good enough. It hurt everytime someone forgot to text him back or just straight up ignored him, he knew it was killing him; Sure maybe he can't be saved but that doesn't mean others can't as well. 

Peter would always make sure people were okay, no matter how low he felt, or how lost, broken, alone. He always asked, always tried his very hardest to make sure people were happy. Then they would ask him, and he wants to tell them he isn't okay, that he is broken and feels more alone than ever, but he doesn't. No. He says he is fine, at the end of the day he knows they don't really care. How could someone really care about him. He knew when people asked if he was okay they didn't mean it, they are just trying to be polite. 

Anytime he would try to tell Ned or MJ, they wouldn't really listen and flip the conversation back to something else. It hurt. A lot, but he would never blame them or hold it against them, what right does he have to do that. But what hurts is the feeling that you aren't really loved, that you are there for everyone yet not one person is there for you. 

Peter knows it's getting worse. That his 'down days' are getting longer and harder. And his 'Happy days' are getting shorter and darker. Some days are just empty now, there is nothing there to feel. Peter is so scared that it will get worse and soon he will be drowning in his sorrows. But he keeps smiling, keeps helping others. He just wants it to end, tired of the thoughts that occupy ever place in his mind and soul. He knows that soon his time will be up, but for now he has to do everything in him to make everyone else okay and happy. 

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A/N- Oh... 

- M xx