every day is christmas when i'm with you

you make every day feel like it's christmas

~thursday, the 3rd of january~

Amanda fell asleep shortly after the call with Ally by her side. She woke up late and could barely open her eyes they were so puffy. She wanted to fall right back to sleep, exhausted from crying all night and emotionally weighed down. It felt like lead-filled her stomach when she even thought about getting up and out of bed. Then, outside the door in the hallway, she could hear Ally speaking to someone.

"Calm down, she's just been sleeping, she's not ignoring you. She has a right to though," Ally said, then paused and Amanda realized she was talking on the phone. "Lou, I'll tell you when she wakes up, alright? Now stop bothering me... No, save your apologies for Amanda, you're gonna need it,"

Amanda felt her heart sink when she realized she was speaking to Louis. She didn't even know how to feel about all this, even knowing that Louis was apparently trying to apologize. It all felt fucked. How were they going to just apologize and move on from this?

Ally opened the door again and Amanda closed her eyes to try and avoid any conversation.

"Amanda," Ally called out. Shit. She opened her eyes slowly and saw Ally slowly entering the room, her phone still in her hand. "You alright?"

"Kinda," She couldn't help that her eyes lingered on the diamond ring on her finger. The promise ring Louis gave her. Her eyes teared up again, surprising both the girls. Amanda didn't think she'd have any more tears to cry.

"Amanda... He's been trying to call you for hours," Ally told her, lying down on her bed. Amanda covered more of her face with her blanket, wishing she could hide away from all this. She couldn't stop glancing at the ring though. Louis bought this just weeks after they met and she couldn't deny the look in his eyes when he said he loved her. It was true, as true as the magic between them. The sparkle in Louis' eyes when she opened that box was real, Amanda hadn't dreamt all this up. They were in love; how could she treat him like that?

"Ally, I think I really messed up," Amanda murmured, mouth covered by her fluffy blanket. Ally frowned, putting her chin on her hand thoughtfully.

"Yeah, but it can be fixed. This is not the end, you know that," Ally reassured her. "Just call him," Amanda nodded. "Do you want me to make breakfast first?" She nodded again.

So, Amanda crawled out of her cocoon of blankets and sat at the kitchen island while Ally made eggs and pancakes, and even croissants. They still put on their Christmas playlist, to hold on to it a little longer. Outside Amanda could see a flurry of snow, dark clouds filling the sky making it look like a complete whiteout.

"Yeah, looks like we're probably snowed in today," Ally says, putting a plate full of food in front of Amanda. They ate in silence, with just the music to fill the apartment. "We should watch Home Alone," Ally chuckles, but Amanda doesn't really see what she would be laughing about. Ally doesn't say anything else until they finish eating and even then, she just offers to clean up.

"I'm gonna... call," Amanda mumbles. Ally looks up at her and just nods, giving a small smile of encouragement. Amanda shuffles back into her room, closing the door behind her. She picks her phone up from the floor where she must have dropped it last night and notices the missed calls and texts from Louis. She doesn't bother looking at them, not wanting to put this off anymore.

She dials his number and he picked up in a heartbeat.

"Amanda, love, I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have – " Louis starts, voice panicked and strained.

"No, no, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that you couldn't have friends, I was just... scared," She admitted. Louis sighed.

"I overreacted too, and I shouldn't have called you crazy, that was a dodgy move," Louis scoffs. Amanda can't help but let out a breathy laugh.