Shattered Thoughts

Poem: I Was...

This poem is about 4 different people and each line is one of their own.

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I was 15 when it happened.

I was 13.

I was 4.

I was 40.

He drugged me.

I got shit-faced.

He turned me on my stomach.

His friends watched.

I was stumbling around.

Why can't I remember all of it?

He said it wouldn't hurt.

I wonder if the friends are going to join.

Why couldn't I speak?

Why did I get so drunk?

Why didnt anyone teach me to say no?

Why did his friends laugh?

It's 6 years later.

10 months later.

12 years later.

3 days later.

I tear at my skin...

I rip my hair out...

I took apart the razor...

I found a gun...

Red angry marks.

Missing patches.

Pooling colorless blood.

One fatal hole.

Why couldn't I stop crying?

Why didn't I say something sooner?

Why didnt I say no?

Why did I trust him?

I should have used something sharper.

I should have stopped myself.

I should have cut deeper.

I shouldn't have pulled the trigger.

I didn't know that asking him to get me a drink would...

I didn't know drinking so much alcohol would...

I didn't know talking to him would....

I didn't know trusting him would...

I talked to him once.

I had never seen him before.

I offered him one of my juice boxes.

I talked to them everyday.

He was an acquaintance.

He went to my school.

He was my sister's boyfriend.

They were my best friends.