ALL ACCESS

Chapter 5

We stayed an extra day in Mass to pack up Jules' items and get everything in order. She needed to close some accounts and do a few things, plus flights out of Boston were booked solid. I called Lisa back to let her know about our delay but never reached her. I only hoped that Chris didn't give her too much shit and wondered if he'd be angry with me.

When we landed in Cali late the next day I breathed a sigh relief. I wasn't much of a flier, airplane descents always made me a smidge white-knuckled. Jules, however, loved it, as she did the idea of being in the sun year round and living in California. On the long flight I filled her in on everything that happened when I left Massachusetts including what happened with me and Chris, as well as what life was like on the road with a rock band. Two busy-body old tarts behind us were listening in, I could hear them whispering and clucking at my peppered language so I made sure to use the words fuck, meaty cock, and dildo every chance I could just for their benefit. Poor Jules was in stitches by the time I finished telling my tale.

I heard tittering behind me so I stood, turned and looked right at them. One had the good grace to look away, but the other one narrowed her eyes and called me a groupie then told me I would fry in a hell.

A groupie, do what? I never considered myself a groupie. Those girls slept with any musician just so they could have bragging rights. They didn't even care if they got traded off to another band member, or even to another band entirely. So long as they could say they slept with so and so, those girls were happy. It was all the same to them, one more musician they could tick off their never-ending list.

Me, I dig musicians but I didn't do that shit. I don't have a list. It's not like I have slept with a bunch of 'em anyways, just a few. Two of them was break-up sex and the others, because I happened to like the guy. Most of the musicians I'd been with I knew from being around Flux. I don't brag about anything that I have seen. Groupies were typically one-night stands. I'm only with one man at a time and when it's up - it's up. I get heart-broken. I don't share. I don't play around. When I'm with them I am one-hundred percent theirs.

For the love of Pete, I am not a groupie. When Chris left me for that blonde I was hurt beyond belief. At the time, I thought we shared something more between us than his cock. Now he's back and wants me. I'm over-the-moon thrilled.

Lisa's a groupie, she admits it. She doesn't date anyone that isn't a musician. She goes out of her way to meet bands and get that coveted 'ALL ACCESS' badge. I hang out with musicians because I work and play at the same place they do and because I'm with Lisa. To some, I suppose, that makes me a groupie but I don't think so...maybe. I enjoy being in their world. Music soothes my soul, always has and will. How can one not love someone who sings fervent words or plays music that reaches in and grabs at your heart and soul and emotionally twists them in wanton abandonment?

Chris for all his rock-star bad-boy persona has a soft spot. Most people don't know his dad used him as a punching bag when he was younger after his mom died. Now he donates money to shelters to help others in that situation. Chris makes me feel alive especially when he sings with edge and grit. His lyrics are potent and touch me in ways that no one can. This is why I love him and Flux. Their music pulses with intense energy and unbridled passion, filling you with a burning ache, a need; lyrics sung unrestrained leaving you raw, sensitive, quivering, and wanting more.

"Yo girl. Snap out of it. You okay?" Jules insistent shake drew me out of my reverie.

"Hmph, I'm not a groupie. If I met Chris and was with him for two months back home, nobody would call me a groupie. If I went out a few times with David Lee or Sid back home I still wouldn't be considered a groupie. So why is it when a girl gets with a musician and sleeps with them she's immediately called a groupie? Couldn't I just be a girlfriend?"