better now ➳ post malone

ch. 32

clementine // halsey

I let Austin cool down by himself for about thirty minutes. Finally, I made my way up to our bedroom and knocked on the door, opening it slightly.

"Are you okay?" I asked him and he got off of the bed, walking to the door to open it all the way. His face was red, puffy, and tear-stained.

"Liv, I should be asking you that," He sighed, trying to hide that he had been crying. "I'm sorry if I scared you or you're mad at me for yelling at Randy, but knowing someone hurt you.. It just turns me into someone I don't even know."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you," I shook my head as he caressed my cheek and then put my hair behind my ear. I never knew Austin could be so soft.

"Although I would have liked to known, I understand," He told me, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "Besides, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to. I don't want to be one of those husbands that's overbearing."

"Caring about me isn't being overbearing," I told him, stepping into the room and sitting on the edge of the bed. "It's my fault, I knew he wanted me to come to Izzy's apartment. I knew he'd do something to me."

"I don't want to ever hear you say it's your fault again," Austin said, sitting down beside me. "It's no one's fault but that motherfucker's who I swear to God, Liv, I will murder with my own fucking hands."

"Calm down," I told him, putting my hand on his knee. "If it makes you feel any better, I wasn't awake for any of it."

"It doesn't make me feel any better," he told me. "The only reason I'm trying so hard to be calm right now is because I know it'll make you upset if I'm not."

"Listen, bad things happen to people all the time," I said, turning towards him. "And just because we have a different life than most people doesn't mean we're excluded from those bad things."

"Olivia, stop making this seem like it's not a big deal, like you got robbed or something," Austin said to me, his eyebrows furrowed. I could tell he was as mad as he's ever been. "You're my entire world. How can I brush this off like you're doing? You may not care what happens to you, but you literally keep my heart beating. I love you and I want you safe always."

"I understand, and I'm sorry," I told him, leaning my head on his shirtless chest. His hot skin comforted me, even though I know it's because he's pissed.

"You'll have security everywhere you go from now on," Austin stated. I lifted my head up and looked at him. "I don't care if it's just to the store."

"Austin, he's in California," I told him. "I don't need security."

"I just want to be safe," he told me. "I want you to be safe."

"I said I don't need security," I looked at him.

"Olivia, now is not the time to argue!" He raised his voice. "You're gonna have security."

"So much for not being an overbearing husband," I said under my breath, loud enough for him to hear though.

"Fuck, I'm sorry," he huffed. "Be mad at me if you want but I can't let there be a possibility of you being hurt again. I can't, Liv."

"I'll have security," I agreed. "Only if you apologize to Savannah."

"What? No!" He scoffed at me. "No, I won't be talking to her for a very long time."

"For what reason, Austin?" I shook my head at him. "She had no idea you didn't know. You and I, we tell each other everything. She assumed you knew about it."

"It's not the fact she told me," he said to me and I listened. "It's the fact she betrayed you. She knew what she was doing. She wouldn't have been mad at that pregnancy test if she knew that I knew. Come on."

"I know she doesn't like me that much but you come on," I told him, scooting a little away. He was pissing me off. "She wants so badly for you to treat her the way you treat our friends. She wants to be part of your family and you never let her. I don't think she'd ruin the small chances she has."

"She's just my sister, just blood," he told me. "She hasn't done anything close to what my friends have done for me. Those are my family, not her."

"She's trying, babe," I told him, running my hands through his hair to keep him calm. I could tell he was going to get heated soon. "Maybe you should ask her to go back on tour with you. Just for a little while at least. It will give y'all some time to open up to each other."

"I love you but that is a stupid idea," he said, getting off of the bed.

"Don't say that," I shook my head at him. "You ask her, or at least apologize to her. If you don't, I'm out Austin."

"What do you mean you're out?" He asked me.

"I'll be gone until you leave again," I shook my head at him. I hated to blackmail him but I know his ego wouldn't let him apologize otherwise.

"Are you serious right now?" He asked me, his eyes desperate. "Olivia, what? Why are you defending someone who barely likes you?"

"Because I need you to stop self-destructing!" I said to him. "You may not think you need her but Jesus Christ, Austin! I know what you're doing because you did it to me."

"And what is that, exactly?" He asked me.

"You love her so you're pushing her away before you look too vulnerable," I said to him and he got really quiet. "You can't stand the fact you love someone that has anything to do with your dad."

"Olivia," he sighed, sitting back down on the bed.

"I know you, Austin," I told him. "I've been in love with every part of your mind for over five years now. I know how your brain works, I know how you are. Just fucking listen to me, for once, please."

"Okay," he nodded to me. "I will apologize to her."

"Because I'm right? Or so I won't leave?" I huffed at him.

"As much as I absolutely hate to admit it, it's because you're right," he told me, looking at the ground. "You are. I just can't process that in my head like you can."

"You've let everyone else in. Even Q knows your vulnerabilities. Like how you put ketchup on your eggs," I said and he laughed at me. I smiled and continued. "So what's so different about Vannah?"

"I guess it is because she's Jamie's daughter," he sighed, shaking his head. "It's hard to trust someone that has a relationship with him."

"She is not your dad," I told him. "She's your sister... Who loves you so much and would do anything for you."

"I know," he nodded. "I know, and I am sorry."

"Tell her that, not me," I said, giving him a small kiss on the lips. "Now can we make this visit with our friends normal again?"

"Yes," he smiled at me. "Well, as normal as it can be with this group."