The Words I couldn't Say

"smart"

I hate when people say I'm smart
When I'm panicking over a test and they say
"Shut up you'll probably get 100 again,"

Just because I'm "smart" means I can't worry?
That I can magically understand everything?

I'm not smart
What I do is not "being smart"
It's called working my ass off

You think I can actually understand any of this shit?
No I can't
But I'm going to try

That's the difference between us

You don't understand and don't try to
You whine about not getting it
Then you go on to do whatever and later you'll whine about your grades

I don't understand and I try to
I whine but I keep trying
I don't stop to do something because I'm frustrated

I don't even have motivation to do it
But I still fucking do

I don't want to be harsh but this has been boiling inside of me and it's finally overflowing

Stop acting like I'm "so smart"
Stop acting like I'm the one to blame because I was "born smart"

Your the one to blame and I'm getting sick of hearing about how I am

I wasn't born smart
I am not smart
I work hard

What annoys me most is when people thinks it's so easy for me

Do you think it's easy?
Do you honestly think I don't have a hard time?
What's wrong with you?

And I get that you're probably having a hard time too
That's why you don't work as hard as you can
But blaming me?
Punishing me for trying?

Just fucking stop

Stop it

Not only do you hurt and offend me
But you have the audacity to roll your eyes
Brush my feelings away why don't you

So there you go
I'm not smart
I just work hard

And you don't

That's the difference