And The Words We Couldn't Speak

23

"Hey, "Mikey said, coming onto the bus. "Have you seen Gerard?" I looked nervously towards the bunks. I didn't know whether to cover for him or to seek help for him. Telling Mikey would just cause him to worry and I hated that.

"Yeah, he was really tired so I told him he should just go lay down. I think he's coming down with a cold, "I lied.

"Oh, I should go check on him..."He said, turning to go back.

"No, I gave him some Nyquil and so, I think he'll be fine later, "I said, grabbing his arm quickly. He smiled at me and I kissed him quickly.

"Someone missed me, "he smiled, wrapping his arms around me.

"You have no idea, "I muttered. I put my head on his chest and closed my eyes.

"Well, in just a few days, we'll be off for a couple days. I think that'll be good, "he said randomly.

"I'll be spending them with you anyways, "I laughed. "It doesn't matter to me as long as you're there."

"Well, I'm glad you feel that way. Gerard seems to hate me even more now..."He muttered quietly.

"No, if anything, he hates himself. I think he'll be fine in a while. Just don't worry about it, okay?" I said, kissing him softly. He smiled and kissed me back.

A few minutes later, Frankie came in with an ice cream cone. I laughed at him as he tripped and splattered it on his face.

"No! Not the ice cream cone, "he cried. I hung my head and laughed. "It's not funny, Rere."

"Aw, "I said softy, walking over to him. I picked up a napkin on the way and wiped his face off. "You're right. It's not funny." He smiled at me. "It's hilarious!" He pouted.

"That wasn't very nice..."He said quietly.

"Aw, you know I love you, Frankie, "I said, wrapping my arms around him.

"You do?" He asked, raising a brow.

"Of course I do, "I said, kissing his cheek. He seemed to cheer up and went about with his business.

The next couple of weeks flew by. Gerard made me a promise when he woke up from his nap that day that he wouldn't drink again. I was happy about that. I was sitting on the bus, talking with Ray about a new song that Gerard was working on.

"I think it'd be pretty cool to have you guys be playing for like a group of kids. Then, they could like attack you guys or something towards the end, "I threw out there. Ray smiled at me.

"Well, the teenagers do scare the living shit out of him, "he laughed.

"Yeah, I saw today wh- "I stopped. I felt a burning sensation in my chest. It took me a minute before I realized what was going on. I ran to the bathroom, and felt the vomit pour out. I started to stand up, but more vomit came up. After a couple of minutes, I figured I had thrown up enough. I flushed and grabbed the bottle of mouthwash to wash out the horrible taste. I gargled and spit it into the sink. I went back to Ray who stared at me quizzically.

"What the hell was that?" He asked, setting down his notebook.

"I don't know. I just suddenly felt like I was going to throw up and I did..."I said quietly. He looked at me for a minute.

"Tell me this..."He started. "Have you been nauseous? Do you get random mood swings and headaches?" I nodded slowly. "Okay, this is awkward, but... When was the last time your Aunt Flo came to visit you?"

"Who the hell is Aunt Flo?" I asked, thrown off by his random question.

"Oh my god, you are so slow. When was your last period?" He asked annoyed.

"I don't know... A while ago..."I said slowly.

"Have you and Mikey... You know..."He said, raising a brow. I nodded slowly.

"What does that have to do with anything?" I asked, not sure of what he was getting at.

"You may want to get a test, "he suggested, putting his feet up.

"What the hell would I need a test for?" I asked, completely unaware of what the hell he was talking about. Then, it hit me. "Oh, you're talking about a pregnancy test..."