Delightful chaos

One

"Are you up?" I jump in surprise when I hear a voice coming out from the room's door while I'm sitting in the balcony and about to eat my breakfast. It should be Eva, she's a nurse in this rehab, and also my only friend here. During the last two years, I had no one but her. I don't really like talking to patients here, it bothers me. "Rose?" I suddenly hear Eva's voice echoing through my almost empty room as I get up from the chair.

"I'm here," the weather is so cold outside so I decide to pick up my breakfast from the balcony's table with me to the room. When I turned my face, I found Eva sitting nervously in my bed. I put the plate on the little table in front of the bed, as I hurry and sit near her wondering what she's hiding and what could be making her look so worried like this, "Are you okay?" I ask her, waiting impatiently for her answer.

I can see a wide smile on her face now, with an exited look, but yet still, the worried look on her face isn't fading. I know Eva so well, and from the looks on her face, I can exactly tell what's going on through her mind or what she's feeling.

"Look, what I'm about to tell you now is, surely, what you've been waiting to hear since the first time you entered this rehabilitation. But what's causing me to look so worried is I'm not quite ready to stay alone in here with no friends and no one to talk to, except the doctors. It sucks for me to be in this place without you" when she finishes telling me what's going on, I try to recognize what she's really trying to tell me. Wait... Am I getting out of here? No, this can't be happening; they said I should wait six more months. She explains more when she says "This must be the best thing to happen for you in two years. You're getting out of her tomorrow, the doctor told me this the morning, he said you got better and he noticed a lot of progress in your situation, and that the treatments you've been on lately went so good and it didn't even took so long with you to get over your addiction like other patients," Holy shit, this is real. I'm speechless and just listening to her "He also said that he called your aunt to pick you up tomorrow morning from the rehab."

Why the heck should this living creature - my aunt – always ruin my happiness. She's always ruining everything for me, God, she's the one who ruined my life except for my serial killer uncle who started all this shit, but my aunt couldn't realize how much feeling alone sucks. She's my aunt for crying out loud and should've supported me while I was in shock when I realized I was just another kid who's left with no parents and no friends.

All I wanted was to just run away from my bitter reality, and the only way to utterly escape from it was drugs. I no longer wanted to be in this nasty world.

But what my aunt did to 'help' me was simply throwing me in this awful rehabilitation.

I suddenly got lost in my thoughts so I shake my head and try to focus again on Eva and the fact that I'm actually getting out of here.

"Eva, I'm just so speechless, you surprised me by this, it's both good and bad. I, too, don't wanna be without you, you're a great friend and whatever I do or say, it will never be enough to thank you for all of the things you've done for me the last two years. These years should be the worst years of my life, but you made them so much less painful..."

Suddenly, she laughs a little and starts her ridiculous complaining about what I just said and says "oh my God, Rose, stop! You're making me feel like we're never gonna meet again or we're just about to die"

I roll my eyes at her as I whisper "yeah, that's what's going to happen if you don't get up and eat that breakfast over there with me"

She smiles at me widely and gets up from the bed as she walks to the table, I join her and sit at the chair as I pick up my toast and coffee. We kept talking for a good hour after eating our breakfast. It was always pretty fun talking to Eva, she was always able to make me feel like nothing was wrong in my life.

Unfortunately, Eva had to go see a patient, so now I'm alone at my room and I have no idea what I'm going to do for the rest of the day.

In the rehab center, days seem to be so long. There's a lot of 'activities' patients can do but they're just some boring shit. So all I can do during the day is lie in bed and wait until I should go see the doctor or my therapist. The treatment I've been on the last two years wasn't really easy for me especially when I was a new patient, I had to go through a lot to accept the fact that things changed. And what I mean by things changed isn't just the fact that I no longer have a normal life like other teenagers with family and friends and school, it's about dealing with the painful truth which is living with no parents. It was hard in the beginning, but now I'm accustomed to this new life routine.

I decided to go outside my room and sit in the cafeteria since it's the last day for me in this place, and I'm allowed to do what I want.

While walking to the small cafeteria, I saw a lot of patients; most of them are old, or maybe all of them. I'm the youngest patient here, that's why I don't like to make 'conversations' with people here.

Rehab is quiet nice, I mean it looks nice from the outside, but inside of it, it's a completely awful place. Sometimes, I get so sick of it and can't handle this no more so the only solution that comes to my mind is drugs. But I can't use them, that's why it often becomes hard for me here.

When I'm finally in the little café, I order some coffee and sit in the back of the cafeteria just staring at the window, there's only the grass and the grey sky. Total emptiness.

After drinking my coffee, I rush to my therapist's office. Usually I should have two hours with her today but since I'm going tomorrow I don't know if there's something special she's going to do with me.

I knock twice at the door not wanting to make any noise.

"Come in" I hear her say from the room, I open the door and sit in a chair next to her desk.

She smiles widely at me and opens a folder in front of her as she says "Rose" I can tell she has something to tell me from the weird look on her face. She was reading something in the folder and now her head is up and she's looking at me seriously.

"Yes?" I try to break the silence between us in the large room and I can see her smiling again. Honestly, I don't understand what she's trying to show me by this.

"You've been here since September 2009, right?"

"Yes" I guess she doesn't know that I already know I'm leaving rehab tomorrow.

"Well, uh, it seems like one of the employees here told you that you're getting out of here, didn't they?" I knew it. Nothing new.

"Yes, Eva did" I give her a small smile and she looks down again at her folder.

"Right. Rose, I have a few questions to ask you."

Not again. God, I hate her questions, they're so bothering. I usually don't like talking about myself so much.

It took us one hour for her questions; she asked me about how I'm feeling with my health and about my addiction to drugs and a few questions about my family. The rest of the day I just locked myself inside of my room and read a good book.

I'm feeling extra excited for tomorrow, I have no doubts that I'll be so much happier there, for sure, but I don't know why I have a strange feeling about it, I mean I didn't have friends the last couple of years except Eva so I have no idea how to make new friends in real life, school...

It kind of scares me.

I shake my head to escape all of these negative thoughts and decide to think about tomorrow.

While thinking about tomorrow, a thought about my mean aunt comes to mind and the fact that I have no place to stay in except her house freaks me out.

I kept thinking about a lot of stuff, like every night, before I closed my eyes and everything went black.

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So this is the first chapter, hope you guys liked it, i just wanna say that i'm soo sorry about the mistakes and if you find it boring or kinda short... i promise that the next chapters won't be the same! :)  I will be updating a new chapter every week !

Pleaaaase, vote and comment :)  xoxo

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