Dilemmas

15

The party was spoiled even before it started.

"You should keep it down," Shaun offered. "This is—"

"I promise you, I won't tell anyone," Caleb demanded. "Now tell me what's going on."

Shaun looked at Ryan, who bit his lip. The wind blew, giving Shaun the goosebumps thanks to the damp shirt. "Um, it's actually hard to explain—"

"Caleb," he heard Glen say. All three looked at him and Dan, who arrived with two towels. They tossed it to him. "Catch."

He caught it and gave it to Shaun and Ryan. "Here," Caleb said. "Wipe yourselves."

Shaun rubbed his towel on his head and wrapped it around his wet shirt. "Thanks."

He smiled apologetically. "No problem." Then he stood up and walked to his other friends. "Come on, let's play for a while." He placed both his arms on both his friends' necks. Then they began walking away.

Before they reached the corner, he turned to eye Shaun. Tell me the deets later, he mouthed, as they disappeared from Shaun's sight.

Ryan placed his arm around his back. "Are you okay?"

His mind began screaming hysterically. HOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLYSHITHOLY—

But he maintained composure. "Yeah," he managed. "But it's cold."

Ryan unwrapped the towel around him and gave it to him. "Here."

His teeth chattered as Ryan placed it around him. "Thanks."

He smiled. "No problem."

"But how about you? Will you get cold?"

He chuckled. "I'm used to it. Doesn't matter if I get cough or who-knows-what. . ."

Shaun laughed a little, but the shrill laugh ended in silence. They stared at the pool, where he just recently fell into.

But holy shit. Caleb knows. Caleb knows that I'm in live with him. What should I do?

"Let me ask the question again. Are you okay?"

Shaun turned to face Ryan. The chilly wind blew again. He tried putting up his best smile. "Yeah. Why are you asking that?"

He frowned. "Don't lie."

"I'm not. I'm just—" He caught himself. If I lie to him, I would just keep building the tower with sand, not stone.

Then he thought of the many things that happened in his life. Caleb knowing. Kaden Pride. The spreading rumor. His love for him.

Does he know the spreading rumors? Or my love? he thought.

Shaun sighed deeply. It was time to tell the truth. "It's so many things, Ryan. I. . .I just don't know where to start."

Ryan squeezed Shaun's hand. "I'm here. You can tell me anything."

Shaun smiled genuinely this time. "I'm worried."

"About what?"

He took a deep breath. "About everything. My life's a mess. I've been a mess. And now. . .after the first kiss, I don't—I don't know where this will lead us."