fly | madderton

ELEVEN

"Wait... What the fuck?"

Taron's heart sank. Whilst he'd anticipated bad news, he was hoping it wouldn't happen, and certainly didn't expect such a negative response. He quickly shifted his gaze back to the floor as Richard stood from his chair, not wanting to see his face.

"Taron?"

He still kept his eyes on the ground, scanning the slates they were sat on for a secret portal into another dimension, or any method of escape from the awful situation he'd got himself into. How he ever thought just coming out with his feelings was a good idea, he hadn't the foggiest.

"T. Look at me."

His eyes were stinging, and Taron did not want Richard to think he was pathetic enough to cry over him. 'I think I have feelings for you,' was an incredibly vague way to put things, and could even allude to Taron being unsure about the way he felt. Crying would only show Richard how invested he was in his 'potential' feelings.

"Taron."

Ever so slowly, he lifted his head and met Richard's eyes. It took all of his willpower for Taron to hold back his tears, but he knew he could not let them fall, not under any circumstance.

"How could you?"

"How could I?" Taron asked, not quite sure what avenue Richard was attempting to argue.

"Yes! How could you? I'm leaving tomorrow, and I'm not going to see you for God knows how long, and you think it's okay just to say something like that? What the fuck, Taron?" Richard's body language was mad, his hands raking through his hair and his head tipped back slightly. Taron wasn't quite sure how to respond. Although Richard seemed angry, his words almost said otherwise. If he was homophobic, why wouldn't he just be happy that he might never see Taron again?

"I don't... What? Which part... The, uh... You don't like that I'm gay?"

Richard's demeanour immediately softened. "Oh my god, no. Don't think that. You... I'm not bothered who you like. Really, that's... You think I'm that much of a dick?"

Now it was Taron's turn to feel like a knob.

"No, no! No, just that..." The tears were threatening to spill, "You just seem so mad...Not everyone's fine with it."

Richard began to pace, walking up and down the paved area behind the house. Every step he took make Taron's heart beat faster. He was utterly confused, no idea as to why Richard was mad, or why he was feeling so conflicted over the confrontation. He was even starting to consider keeping all of his feelings to himself in the future, and taking every secret crush to his grave.

"God. I wish you wouldn't just spring shit on me like that. I can't believe you, Taron."

Like the perfect definition of a drama queen, Richard made a beeline for the back door and stormed indoors, leaving a tearful Taron sat on the patio. The slam of the door seemed to unsettle the floodgates and let the stinging wetness of his eyes flow. Mission successful: he'd just lost a twelve year friendship.

———

Soon enough, it was the next day. Charlie had taken the passenger seat to give Richard and Taron their space in the back. The other two boys knew how close they were, and didn't want to interfere in their last few moments together before being torn apart again. They had no idea what had gone on the night before, not even Jamie. Taron had been meaning to tell him, but was terrified to tell anyone anything for the time being, just in case they too decided to turn on him.

It didn't make the journey too awkward, however, as Richard was mature enough to hold a civil conversation with the whole car, including the boy sat beside him. Taron was less so, but hadn't really spoken to anyone. The crushing weight of Richard's departure was hurting, and placing it on top of the fragile state of their relationship was making everything so much worse. Their morning together hadn't been too rough. Richard had made friendly conversation with Taron's parents around the breakfast table, and Taron's mother had put her son's unusual silence down to Richard leaving. She wasn't far off, but she definitely wasn't going to find out the real reason. She didn't have to, however, as she was upset enough over the matter that she nearly had to resort to silence herself. She'd missed Richard almost as much as Taron did, and couldn't stop commenting on how big he'd gotten and how much he'd changed. She'd still had to go to work, so had to say her goodbyes at home. Taron's stepdad had never been as close to Richard, but still gave him a hug and wished him all the best.

Taron hadn't had the time to have an emotional goodbye at home. He probably would have done, had he not taken as much time as he possibly could with every aspect of getting ready. Instead, he was saving it for the platform, praying that they could see eye to eye long enough for a proper goodbye. He couldn't handle Richard just leaving him on a sour note, but was unsure himself what to do to fix the sticky situation he'd thrown himself into.

The car came to a halt, pulling Taron from his thoughts. Charlie and Richard walked ahead into the station, with Jamie and Taron a few steps behind. Jamie gently patted Taron on the back, offering a sympathetic smile.

"It's okay, mate. He'll be back," Jamie said, thinking that he was being reassuring. In reality, Taron could only imagine how much it would sting if Richard were to come back, just to visit Charlie and Jamie. It would kill him.

Taron just nodded, keeping his head down and blindly following Jamie's feet. It really didn't take them long to reach the platform, and Jamie and Charlie were swift to say their goodbyes, have a hug and step away to give the pair space. Taron had never despised their respect for his close friendship with Richard as much as he did in that moment.

"T... I'm sorry. I am, really. I was an ass..."

"Don't. I'm sorry, too... All is forgiven?" Taron slowly looked up, holding his arms out hopefully. Richard smiled, stepping forwards and pulling his friend into a hug.

"All is forgiven," He whispered, squeezing Taron tight. "I'll see you soon, yeah?"

Taron nodded, pressing his face firmly into Richard's shoulder. He could feel the tears slipping out of his eyes, no matter how hard he tried to suppress them.

"Stay in touch. I love you, T."

"I love you too, Dicky."

Richard pulled back, smiling at Taron through teary eyes. He pressed a gentle kiss to Taron's forehead, dragging him in for one last squeeze just as the train began pulling into the station. Jamie and Charlie walked back over to say another goodbye, and to wave off the train. Taron couldn't bring himself to wave. In fact, he could just about find the energy to nod at Richard through the window before he began bawling, crying like a baby.

And Richard wasn't much better off.

drop comments what you think is coming next/what you want to come next... i'm intrigued
also thoughts on this chap/the book so far?