Blainsville

13) Unusual Events

John

The day consisted of three ultrasounds and an unusual encounter with one of Jimmy's coworkers, Howard Price. As I close up the clinic Diana and I grab our files and stand outside me locking the door; rain coming down steadily, "Hey John? I have a question." Diana implies I wasn't sure what this was about but might as well give an answer, "What's up?" She pulls out her red umbrella I'll admit Diana was quite a looker even when damp. "How is it that Howard is as far along as Jimmy? Would that mean they got pregnant at the same time?" That never did occur to me until she mentioned it, "Interesting if You ask me; I guess so. Then again almost every man I've come across that's expecting is the same... Due date... Wait a second." I quickly unlock the door again leaving Diana standing in the rain. I run into my office and grab the file we looked over earlier; Diana pokes her head in the door, "I didn't mean to instigate anything I was just curious. I really should be getting home James is probably starving and so am I. Do you know any good chinese takeout places? I could so go for some fried rice right now I've been craving it all day." I'm not paying attention to anything she's saying because my mind is reeling. "They were all inseminated at once." I mumble to myself, "Excuse me?" Diana says. "I said they were all inseminated at once. This wasn't an accident in fact it has nothing to do with sex at all. Even if they all had sex in the same 24 hour period this wouldn't be possible. If its not physically possible than that means when all the women were hypnotized the men had succumbed to some kind of anatomical virus. I knew it!" I exclaim pushing past the door. I relock it again and tell Diana, "I've figured it out, Diana! God Damn it you're a genius!" I hop into my car and quickly pull out of the parking lot. Something finally made fucking sense.

Diana

I watched as he quickly drove off leaving me to stand in the rain in utter confusion. Sure its easy being punctual and organized after all it's my specialty but speaking in doctors tongue was the hard part, he never did give me a good takeout place I could really use a shrimp egg roll right now. As I'm driving around in town in search of decent Asian food I come across a Panda Express, it was pricey but if they have egg rolls its so worth it. "What would you like this evening?" The drive thru speaker asks it doesn't take long for me to decide, I'll take lo mein and orange chicken with sweet and sour sauce on one order and the other I'll have 2 shrimp egg rolls, fried rice and kung pao chicken." "What kind of drinks?" Damn it time to guess, "Medium sprite and medium Pepsi." That should be enough, "That'll be $22.50 meet at the first window." As I turn into the window I flip on the radio out of silent habit that's when it gets strange. "Since the epidemic of male pregnancies has become not just a problem population wise but has become a topic of taboo. According to some the city of New York has begun to quarantine their victims. Here's Dr. Alexander Waldeu to explain more..." I make it to the window and hand the cashier forty dollars. As I'm sitting waiting for my change it gets stranger; I could see behind her in the store where one of the guy cooks suddenly faints. I can hear everyone inside confused and worried crowding around him the cashier hands me my order and my change, "Just take it, anything else?" I shake my head abd drive off. The thirty minute drive home is uneventful just listening to the radio host talk about a few cities that had been quarantined due to something about population blow, it didn't sound typical but somehow was becoming that way. By the time I'm home the rain had slowed to a drizzle but it got chilly so much for mid September. "Jimmy, I'm home! I couldn't make it to your office tonight I called earlier, your boss. They said they wanted to talk to you in person tomorrow morning. I brought some chinese food I didn't know what you would want so I guessed... Honey? James where are You?" I set the food on the coffee table I figured we could watch a horror movie together we needed the bonding time. I look in the bathroom he's not in there; I walk into the bedroom and discover he's out cold sprawled out on the bed with the tv still on. Part of me wanted to crawl into bed with him maybe get a little frisky but another part of me wanted to just watch him breath a steady up and down; his hand across his stomach. Its funny cause I hadn't noticed how he was already showing so much it was a small bump but it did stick out against his slim frame. I sneak into bed beside him laying completely still and calm enjoying watching him sleep. Something about it made me feel better about what he was doing for us. I put my hand on top of his it took me this long to realize what used to be abs was now firm flesh I rub the small bump and whisper, "Hey You two, I'm really excited to meet you. I hope you're both as great as you look in your pictures. I hope you are little girls we would love a couple of princesses." As I continue to whisper sweet nothings to our babies he stirs and barely opens his eyes, "Hi there... How was your first day?" I shrug, "It was alright but honestly I would rather be here beside you all day. How was your day considering you aren't used to having one." He rolls his eyes moving a little closer to me. "I'm pretty sure I read the whole dictionary and finished the presentation... Even though that promotion has flown out the window." I continue to rub his stomach he half closes his eyes and hums I could tell he was enjoying my touch, "It'd be nice to have twin girls but I think I prefer a boy and a girl. I even had a couple names picked out." I sit up quickly super excited, "Oh my God me too! I wanted to name our daughter Novah or Maevis. Our son would be named Thomas." He chuckles sitting up beside me, "That name is so common you call out Tommy and half the kids in preschool turn their heads. How about Adam?" He asks I giggle, "Now who's being cliche? Are you hungry? I bought chinese takeout." He shrugs. "I can try and eat as long as you have rice I'll be alright. Please tell me you have rice?" I giggle at how cute he is, "I see the cravings are coming in. Yes honey, I got fried rice now lets go eat. I'm so exhausted today was awkward as fuck." We are sitting in the living room eating at the coffee table I'd never seen someone dig in all at once devouring his meal in minutes, "I'm still hungry can I have some of yours?" Jimmy begs. I can't say no to the beautiful blue eyes, "But I wanting rice too... We are gonna have to compromise somewhere." James is just staring hard at me then glances down at my tray its game on. We're both racing to see who can fit more food in their mouth which results in a mess and laughter fit, "Alright You won! But I get your fortune cookie." I conclude digging through the bag. "I don't care I'm pretty sure it predicted this situation." He gestures toward his belly, "You're starting to show a little earlier than most maybe its cause its twins." I break open the first cookie and read the fortune out loud, "Unexpected surprises are around every corner. Speaking of unexpected I ran into one of your coworkers, Howard something..." James sighs and chuckles. "Dear God, Howard Price really?! That dude is so annoying and weird I mean yeah I work with him usually doesn't mean I know anything about him though. What was he doing there to begin with?" I turn away and start pacing to avoid the subject. After all it would be weird and unusual as if it wasn't already, "Ana, what was he doing there?" Jimmy stands up or at least attempts trying to match my pacing the same question pops up, "What the hell was he doing there, Ana? Tell me or I'm gonna sit on you..." James falsely threatens he pulls at my hands, "Alright,alright! Calm down Jesus! He was pregnant, Jimmy. Around the same length as you apparently come to think of it most are due the same tine as you." James shrugs he kisses my lips; a slow and passionate smooch, "You're so frisky lately hormones I suppose?" He doesn't reply instead he reaches down for my shirt and takes it off first I easily comply. "I don't know what it really is all I know is I like it." He unhooks my bra next beginning to kiss from my lips making his way down to my chest I cant help but moan that only turns him on more. I quickly pull down his pajama pants, "I want you NOW." I demand. As jimmy is on top thrusting back and fourth each time harder than the last. I cant help but yell out his name with each time, I hope the neighbors don't assume the worst.

Jimmy

After about ten minutes of our tongues battling for dominance over one another me being the winner obviously, "I hate to toot my own horn but beep, beep, beep. I'm pretty sure I hit a different spot we didn't even make it to the bed." We both laugh Diana gets up to go to the bathroom. I'm laying on the couch I catch myself glancing down at my bump; it seemed a bit bigger than a couple weeks ago. I'll admit my calves were swollen which meant I could barely fit in my shoes so I was reduces to my slippers thank god I spend my time at home. The morning sickness went from happening every moment of every fucking day to random bouts of nausea for thirty minutes throughout the day and with my growing belly I'm pretty sure I know what it feels like to swallow a football. "What are you doing, honey?" Diana strolls in brushing her teeth. She was so beautiful I couldn't imagine having a family with any other woman I just wished she was going through the sacrifices instead of me. "Have I told you how wonderful you are?" I smile up at her. I pull her hand to rest on top of my bump, "I'll be blunt with you, Ana I look like a bloated teenage girl. My ankles and calves are swollen from just walking around the house in boredom, I have hot flashes like I came out of an oven but I'm still glad we are doing this... I'm glad you talked me out of that dark, dark place." She gently rubs circles on the firm flesh, "Me too, babe me too." She puts in a DVD I believe it was Evil Dead about forty minutes in I'm getting antsy I could feel that takeout wanting to come back up I didn't want to worry Diana so I kept quiet. "You doing ok? You look kind of pale." I swallow rapidly a couple of times if I open my mouth this isn't gonna be pretty, "James?" I nod at that moment I hurl all over the front of the couch, "Oh shit! Why didn't you tell me, baby?! I'll be right back I'm going to grab a trash can..." I nod quickly I cant hold back so much for takeout. I spend about twenty minutes heaving up dinner the cramps are killer by the time I think I'm done I'm left dry heaving and panting, "You feel any better? I think John gave me some anti nausea pills let me see if I can find them. They should be in my purse." I curl up into a tight ball on the couch and feel like crying stupid morning sickness, stupid hormones, stupid twins. "Why the fuck do they call it morning sickness if it hits you at any time?" Diana shrugs and puts my head on her lap, "I'm not sure, honey. I found the pills let me get you some crackers your supposed to eat light while taking them." I shrug closing my eyes, "What difference does it make? It dies nothing for the fact that these cramps are annoying." Diana kisses my cheek and hands me the pills. I don't care if they make me sleep it sounded really good about now, "You two need to stop making daddy so sick. We love you but this pain thing isn't gonna work." She rubs my stomach I feel my eyes getting heavy. "Come on, love lets get you to bed. I'm exhausted obviously so are you." Diana gets up first waiting for me to take her hand as soon as I sit up I get a sharp shooting pain from my hip to my back, "Yikes ow!" I call out, "What's wrong?! Is it the cramps?!" Shes freaking out, "No its fine just had a sharp pain in my side. I'm alright lets go to bed." I say grabbing her hand trying to maintain my balance. As soon as my head hits the pillow I'm knocked out, "Good night, babe. I love you guys." She whispers in my ear.