"Nidal, if you love me as strongly as you say that you do, then how can you keep yourself from making love to me? Do you not feel an urge to have sex?" I asked.
"It is not without great difficulty that I refrain from making love to you Loula." Nidal lowered his eyes and sighed. "I have mastered my thoughts and feelings, and know how to handle the situation when need be."
"Then please tell me how you are able to do that, so I too can do the same, because I am suffering of need for you and know not what to do." I said.
"I masterbate Loula." He whisphered, and his eyes were blazing with fire as he looked at me.
Fire shot throughout my entire body as I struggled to lay still. With trembling hands I cupped his beautiful face and said, "Nidal, all these years, why have you not taken to your bed a woman to fulfill your sexual desires?" and as soon as I said those words, jealousy consumed me and my heart twisted with pain.
"Would you prefer I do that next time Loula?" he asked me, with a hint of a smile on his face as he waited for a response. His words were like a knife in my heart and I tried to wiggle out of his embrace, but he tightened his hold on me and threw his leg over my body and I was trapped. Not knowing what to do and feeling frustrated, I started to cry.
"Don't cry Loula. I do not have any desire to sleep with any other woman besides you. I have never betrayed you and I never will." He said, his voice husky with passion, as he placed butterfly kisses across my face and down my neck.
I tried to understand his feelings for me. Why would he do this for me? Who am I? I am not unique. Why does he insist on having me when he can choose any other woman in the world?
I looked deep into his eyes for answers. The eyes are the windows of one's soul. He was not the only one with trust issues. I also couldn't believe all this, but all I saw in his eyes was love, adoration, and complete and total submission.
I felt his shaft swollen against my thigh. Every fiber in my body came to life. I was aching for him to take me and make me his. I needed Nidal to claim what belonged to him. My body was on fire, and it was desperately thirsty for his touch, but I knew that tonight was not the night.
I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep. He pulled me closer, and I could feel his hold on me relax. I could not understand how he was able to tame his body to lie next to mine with such ease when my body was aching to be touched by him. Thankfully, sometime in the peaceful night, I fell asleep.
In the morning, the sun splashed its bright light around the room. The window was slightly open, and a delicate, warm breeze softly teased my skin. I could hear the birds chirping cheerfully outside and the horses snorting and chasing each other while the people of Arabia went about their daily business.
I opened my eyes and saw my prince resting his head on his elbow, looking down at me tenderly. I wanted him so desperately that I slipped my fingers through his hair and pulled his head, bringing his lips down to mine.
Without warning, lust unleashed itself inside my entire body as heat exploded furiously, bursting with fire, and consumed all my senses. Nidal lifted my nightgown up over my breast, and his eyes burned with desire as they drifted over my breast and down my belly. He made a strangled sound as his hands glided up my thigh. Skillfully, his fingers worked their magic, sending electric shock waves throughout my entire body.
He scattered scorching kisses over my breast, and I trembled in his arms. My hands traced the outline of his body and found his enlarged bulge that was pressing against my thigh. I slipped my hand inside his undergarment and grabbed it. Immediately, Nidal froze, and in that instant, my world came crashing down.
Embarrassed once again, I looked up at him, questioning his behavior. In answer, he gently pushed me away and quickly jumped out of bed. I looked hungrily at his tall, lean body. Nidal walked slowly to the chair in the corner where his shirt lay, grabbed it, and put it on. With trembling hands, he struggled to button his shirt. His accusing gaze never once left my sight. His huge muscles threatened to rip the very shirt he wore as he bent over and grabbed his pantaloons from the floor.
Embarrassed out of my mind, I quickly threw the covers over my head to hide in the dark, and I tugged my nightgown all the way down to hide my shameless body. Maybe we could ignore what just happened for the sake of my sanity. But my body betrayed me. It was aroused and still shaking from the aftermath. These sexual feelings were new to me, and I knew not how to turn them off.
I peeked outside the covers just as my prince was finished dressing, and he smiled down at me wickedly. The look on his face said, "I'm going to make you pay for all the years I waited for you." I could tell that he knew what I was feeling, and he was going to let me suffer. That was not fair. He needed me to give him a taste of his own medicine. I threw back the covers, but not before I untied the lace from the nightgown that I was wearing. My left breast escaped playfully outside my gown, teasing the eyes of my prince, who just stood there frozen in time, staring at me. His smile now disappeared as lust took over. He looked like a wolf licking his chops. My right breast was exposed in the direct view of the sunlight, and I took my time getting out of bed, pretending I had no idea what was happening.
From the corner of my eyes, I could see cold sweat on my prince's forehead as he swallowed hard. And I looked down and saw his bulge ready to burst the seams of his pantaloons. Good! Let him suffer too. He deserves it!
I marched into the bathroom and closed the door hard, causing an echoing sound to penetrate throughout the room. Now what? What do I do now?
And that was when I noticed the keyhole, and I peeked through it just in time to witness Nidal slam his fist into the closet door behind him, creating a hole the size of his fist. I winced, knowing the pain his hand must be feeling. I could tell it was throbbing.
At that moment, a servant knocked on the door, "Master, is everthything alright?"
"Everything is fine." Nidal said gruffly, and he slid down in the chair that was against the wall, and dropped his face in his hands. I do not know if he is angry or just trying to kill the pain on his hand.
He got what he deserved! I was also in pain. My body ached from wanting him so badly. He made it happen, and then he punished me for it. I feel so embarrassed. Humiliated!
These feelings coming to life inside me were new to me. I did not know the ways of lovemaking. I was a virgin as well, and I felt as if my body had just betrayed me.
At that moment, the queen burst open the door to our room and marched in. Nidal quickly stood and walked over to her. He adored his mother, the only other woman he had ever loved. She was elegantly dressed in pink from head to toe, very fashionable in her gown. Her hair was swept up in an updo, showing off a beautiful pair of pink diamond earrings that dangled from her ears. She had a slender neck and striking facial features that resembled her son's. She was clearly an aristocrat and a very beautiful lady, even at her age.
Nidal took her hands in his and kissed them. The queen smiled up at him, "Where's Loula?'' she asked, as her gaze swept across the room. Nidal remained silent. She pulled away from him and gracefully walked to the door, and turned around and said sternly, "I hate to tell you I told you so, but I did warn you Nidal. Anyhow, dinner will be served in half an hour, do not be late, you know how that irritates your father."
Nidal's jaw tensed up for a second, but he quickly ignored the comment and looked toward the bathroom. When the queen left the room, Nidal checked to make sure the door was locked. He walked over to the bathroom and tried to open it but could not because I had locked it. He banged on it a few times, and then he sharply threatened, "Open this door now Loula, before I break it down!"
Knowing he makes good on his threats, I quickly opened the door, but I was not about to let him off that easy. So I played his game. Nidals eye's appraised me from head to toe. He looked so darn sexy. I had to control myself before I did something foolish.
Nidal swallowed nervously and said, "I am going to the dining room. Come immediately, do not be late!" his tone was cold.
I will not let him rule me. I am not his slave. I will take my time and make them all wait for my arrival.
I
