I'm finally home from the hospital and Jonah did what he said
when i woke up he was in the bed with me and even brought me home
now he's at my house with me and we're going out to dinner tonight
we're watching a movie and he's texting
"can you put your phone down and enjoy the movie please"
"sorry" he puts his phone away and kisses my cheek
we continue to watch the movie and he sighs of boredom
"this movie is so boring"
"hey i like it its my favorite"
"and that's why i'm watching it, for you"
"hey maybe one day you'll watch more things for me"
"what do you mean?"
"maybe you'll come and watch me during math competitions" i say and fakely laugh afterwards "HA! that's funny you would never wow i'm a real joker"
"babe-"
"no no don't say anything i know you wouldn't i'm just making a joke i don't matter to you ha i can't stop laughing i'm such a comedian"
"you do matter to me"
"ha you're an even better comedian. it's okay jonah i know how you feel i'm worthless remember"
"babe i told you i didn't mean that i'm sorry"
"it's fine i guess. it just really makes me upset that you can't come and support me cause if you did something in a competition i would go all the time. i feel like you don't support me and it really hurts"
"i'm so sorry. i'm an awful boyfriend you should just break up with me"
"i don't want to break up with you i love you i just wish you would support your girlfriend" i said support way too much oops
"you know what next competition i will come and after we'll celebrate even if you lose i promise you. it will hopefully make up for all the times i missed it. i promise you"
"why do you suddenly want to come"
"because well i feel like i'm losing you and i can't have that i love you way too much and i need you in my life."
"jonah that was the nicest thing you've said to me ever"
"i'm sorry i'm such a bad boyfriend i really don't deserve you. you're too special to be with an awful asshole like me"
"you're only an asshole when you're angry and call me mean things. next time you're angry can you try not to take it out on me it scares me"
"what are you scared of?"
"you hitting me"
"i-i would never"
"you already did" i whisper but he hears me he holds me tighter and i see a tear roll down his eye
"you're crying?" i ask
"of course i am. i hurt you, i slapped you and i've tried to forget i did that. but i did it and no matter how much i pretend i didn't i did"
"it's okay jonah, i'm just always worried about it happening again"
"don't worry i will never ever again"
"promise me"
"i promise"
-
interesting
