implausible - woosan

chapter seventeen

i can feel you all around me
thickening the air i'm breathing

san wooyoung

14.07.17

the following days are normal, passing as every other. san seems insistent to deny the fact he's eighteen now, and what that means.

it's rather unfair, in his opinion, because wooyoung doesn't know what it entails for their arrangement, and the discussion is clearly not on the table. somehow, he's ended up having feelings for san. he hadn't meant to, but somehow his heart has placed itself firmly within the uncertain hands of choi san.

and san can absolutely not, under any circumstances, find out about wooyoung's feelings. that is, if kibum's words have any truth to them. because that will really fuck things up, as he's currently explaining to yeosang, yunho and mingi.

the four of them are in yeosang's room, lounging on his large bed after a tiring week at school, embracing the weekend friday promises. he's realized he has not been spending as much time with his friends as he should be, and wants to make up for it as well as lift a weight from his shoulders and get his feelings off his chest.

"but why not?" yeosang presses, confusion in his voice. 

wooyoung sighs dramatically, pushing his fingers through his wavy hair. "he'll push me away. that's what he does to people who care about him, or so i've heard. i'd rather for that not to happen."

"wait," wavers mingi, slow on the uptake. "so you and san are, y'know-"

"it's complicated." the blonde mutters, plopping his chin into his hands. "it was his birthday earlier this week, so he should have a soulmate, but he doesn't want to see the name, so-"

"but he wants to be with you?" yeosang confirms doubtfully. "it's giving very selfish fuckboy."

"i guess, but-" wooyoung interjects, but isn't actually sure what his argument is. he doesn't have one, and san does come across that way.

"i knew him a while back," mingi offers thoughtfully. "he didn't seem that way. pretty decent guy, all in all."

"agh, it's so frustrating!" complains the youngest of the four, throwing his hands up. "everything i hear about him is from other people! i wish he would tell me himself."

"but that would involve being honest about his feelings," yeosang finishes for him, "and that's not exactly in the cards."

"it's your choice, really." yunho speaks up, after having listened in contemplative silence. "he's made his position quite clear. it up to you how you respond."

"you really think this is okay?" mingi questions skeptically. "san has a soulmate; it's not wooyoung. he shouldn't pursue him."

"it's not that simple," wooyoung argues, crossing his arms. he's trying to convince himself just as much as them that this is okay, and finds himself adopting some of san's ideology. "we both have a right to be with each other just because we want to, and not because someone else told us we have to be."

yunho must have nodded, or display some kind of agreement wooyoung can't see, because mingi suddenly gets upset.

"i didn't know you felt forced to be with me." he says, hurt.