My 99 Thoughts

Thinking of you

Shit. It's happened again.

I'm thinking of you. I'm feeling blue because it annoys me that I can't have you.

I want to be selfish, greedy and hellish. Have you for my self. Hell, I can't help this.

I blame myself for moving so slow. I knew like hell everyone moves.

Even you, you are no exception.

Am I bad for telling you this now? Should I have waited or sat in my head wondering when the time was right?

I can't tell if I want to scream, shout or yell.

This is hell.

I write for you, about you, with you.

But alas, it's not enough. Because deep down, I'm not enough.

And I know that.

You drive me insane , but it's only fair for I must've led you on.

Or maybe I'm crazy, loony, schizophrenic even.

Maybe what I thought was there wasn't.

Maybe it was all a ruse to help ease my loneliness, longingness and hopefulness.

Maybe I used you to help me? Maybe I am selfish and what I ask is downright greedy.

Is it wrong I don't care. Shit, let them stare.

Because I want you, but I cannot have you.

I want to touch you, feel you, hug you and embrace you.

But alas, I'm only able to be stuck here...

Thinking of you

For all you mofos who've read this far....leave...ion want no questions regarding this poem ;-;