Little [Harry Styles]

[10]

3rd March 2015

***

"There's my favourite Granddaughter!" My Mum laughed, pulling me into a tight hug as she walked through the front door. 

"She's your only  Granddaughter, Mum."

I smiled widely at her and drew my Dad into a hug who was stood behind her, it had been a last minute plan for them to visit us for the afternoon. But I'd been so occupied with Harry that I'd hardly seen them the past two months, and an afternoon with the four of us seemed like exactly what I needed.

"It's good to see you sweetheart." My Dad beamed at me, it had been so long since I had seen him last due to him working on something big at work.

"You too Dad."

"So, how are my favourite girls?"

My mum smiled widely as she took Isabella from my arms, beckoning for us to follow her into the lounge and close the front door. 

"We're doing good, little miss has been doing good with solids, we've figured out that she doesn't like sweet potato and she loves bananas and carrots" I grinned as Isabella laughed in response to my Mum spinning her round playfully, "don't you baby? And she's getting so strong with her legs its crazy, I think she could be crawling by next month!"

"Now thats when the real work starts, you'll be chasing her all over," Mum laughed, bouncing Isabella on her hip, "I remember when Will started crawling, Jesus we didn't know what hit us did we Nick."

"I remember, I'd put him down and I turn round for one second and when I'd turn back he'd be gone," He laughed, leaning against the doorframe. 

"It's already gone so quick," I sighed, brushing a couple of strands of Isabella's hair out of her face, "I'll need to baby proof everything pretty soon."

I looked around at the various ornaments and picture frames on the fireplace and coffee table, knowing that soon enough they'd all have to be moved. In particular, the photoframe on the bottom of the fireplace caught my eye, it was a photo Harry had taken of the two of us one day when he had come to visit; I'd gone to get Isabella from her nap and he'd caught us in a moment of peace and took the photo, and printed and framed it for me.

"And, uh, Harry? How's that going?" Mum's voice snapped me out of my thoughts as she looked at me questioningly. 

"Its been okay actually, I thought Isabella would be on the bottom of his list of priorities with him being so busy...but he's been great, he's video called whenever he can-"

"So he should." Dad mumbled under his breathe.

"Nick! I told you to keep your mouth shut." Mum glared at him.

"Look, I know he's Isabella's Dad and everything but he's got a hell of a lot of making up to do before he gets any words of praise from me," Dad ranted with his arms crossed, "If it were up to me he wouldn't get anywhere near my Granddaughter."

"Well its not up to you, its up to me," I snapped at him, "I know you hate him for what he did but hes still Isabella's Dad, and I owe it to her for her to have a relationship with him."

Dad shook his head disapprovingly, before disappearing into the kitchen to make himself a drink. My Mum looked over at me apologetically as I sighed and fell back on the sofa; I knew my Dad's opinion of Harry, but the thought of having the same argument for the rest of my life with him was exhausting. Harry had more than stepped up as a Father, and I knew how much it killed him being so far away from Isabella; so no matter what my Dad thought about him, I knew I'd made the right decision in telling him he was a Dad.

***

"Do you see the ducks Isabella?" Dad exclaimed, "What do ducks say? Do they say 'quack quack' ?"

I chuckled as I watched my Dad crouched down next to Isabella's pram, pointing at the ducks on the pond as she looked back at him with a look of pure confusion. Myself and Mum had stayed a few paces behind them, letting Dad have some time with her since he was often working when I visited and didn't get to see her as often as he would have liked.

"He means well Marn." Mum stated, looking in the direction of my Dad as he continued making duck noises for Isabella, who didn't seem to care. 

"I know he does, but he needs to let me decide whats best for my daughter, its got nothing to do with him."

"He'll come round eventually," She muttered "How're you holding up with it all anyway?"

"I'm fine, Harry's been great with Isabella, he really is a great Dad-"

"But how are you holding up?"

I paused, taking a second to think about the question. I knew I'd made the right decision, there was no doubt about it that Harry being a part of Isabella's life would benefit her, but him walking back into my life suddenly had made me uneasy. I felt somewhat uncertain about how I was supposed to act around him, last time we saw each other he broke my heart in a matter of minutes, and now hes just the Father of my Daughter. 

"Its weird...him being back in my life," I mused, "Everything's so different from when we last spoke...I kinda feel like I don't know how to act around him and yet...and yet hes still the same Harry."

"Oh honey, you're bound to feel a bit confused," Mum stated, putting an arm around my shoulder. "You never got closure on him, and now he's back playing a totally different role than he was before, you're handling it way better than I would've."

"You think?" She nodded, sending me a reassuring look.

"Have you spoke about how its going to work? Going forward?"

"Not yet, he was barely here for three weeks before he had to leave, we never got a chance." 

I drew my lip in between my teeth at the mention of the future, up until a month ago my future was pretty much set; raise Isabella by myself to the best of my abilities and work hard to provide for us both. But looking forward now everything was up in the air and I hardly knew where I stood, everything felt so uncertain.

"Have you thought about it?"

"A little, its gonna be difficult but I think we'll figure something out, maybe shared custody?" I stated half-heartedly, "Moreso when she gets older, I don't think I'm ready to spend a night without her yet."

"And what about his job, he lives his life in the spotlight, how do you feel about that with Isabella?"

"As much as I don't like it, I've got to understand it comes with his job," I stated, drawing a long breathe, "but I want her to stay unknown about for as long as possible, the longer the public don't know about her the better."

"I think thats for the best, what do you think Harry will think of it all?"

"I know what hes like, he'll do anything that keeps her safe, he was so protective and private over our relationship I can only imagine what he'll be like with Isabella."

My heart sunk at the thought of what felt like the whole world talking about my daughter, about me, and what they'd say. I'd gotten used to it when we were dating, the eyes of the world on your every move, scrutiny over every outfit, speculation about the reality of your relationship, it was exhausing and quickly became second nature to ignore everything in the press. But comments over Isabella were different, the thought of what people would say about her made my body tense, and I had no control over the matter. Harry was her Dad, and sooner or later her existence would become public knowledge and all hell would break loose.

"You're doing a great job with all this, I'm so proud of you."

***
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