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Chapter 22

Gun's pov

I'm so excited that I'll be spending time with P Off today. I just finished my 2nd session of chemotherapy and honestly I get nauseous and dizzy after. The doctor said it was just one of side effects and i will be okay. He also said not to accept patients who are ill for my immune system is weak due to the treatment.

These are all new to me. But no matter how scared I am in the hospital, knowing that my boyfriend will be visiting made my day so special. I can't wait to see him.

Then my mother came and sat down on my bed. She was so serious and I felt nervous.

Gun's mom: I know I'm not suppose to say this now Gun. But I called your father. He said.... he said that he doesn't have any responsibility with us anymore... I'm sorry... I shouldn't say this to you because... I don't want you to feel helpless. But it's okay baby... It's okay... I just want you to know that I will be here for you always okay.

She kissed my forehead after that. She was holding her tears so that I won't feel sad. Actually I already stopped my mom from asking help from my father. Cause I don't want to see her in pain anymore. I don't want to feel hurt too every time he neglects us. I know he already abandoned us from the start, but why does it still hurts deep down inside my heart. He doesn't care if I die so what's the point of still expecting him to come back.

No. I don't have to be sad for now. Im going to meet my boyfriend please remind yourself Gun..  I have to look presentable and not so pathetic so that P won't be worried too much about me.

I waited for almost a half day. Was he okay? He didn't even reply to my messages. He never been this late before. As I was about to text him, a small size giraffe stuff toy was thrown on my laugh, and I knew that he's here already.

Gosh, I missed him very very much. He smiled at me and gave me a light kiss. I even missed the taste of his kisses.

Off: I know you'll be mad that I came here late that's why I bought that stuff toy so that I'll be easily forgiven.

Gun: actually you don't have to. I'll always forgive you😊.

He smiled so genuinely. However, he seemed to look a bit different today. He looked so tired and he really was. He asked me to give him some space on my small bed. After that he laid down next to me and embraced me, and I did the same. We remained silent for several minutes just enjoying each other's embrace.

Then he asked me random things and I also asked him with regards to his school. However, I accidentally slipped and told him about my father's issue. So I became sad again. But instead he just let me feel that he will always be beside me just like my mother. He tightened the embrace and kissed me on the forehead.

I know it was kinda embarrassing as we tend to cuddle on the hospital bed and of course in the public. The nurses and people who passed on my room would tend to sneak a peek and i couldn't help but feel shy..

But it was the best day of my week. Being with P will always be the best memories too.. I want this to be forever..

As P Off was about to go, I couldn't help but cry a little. He told me he'd visit me again next Saturday. I know it's only 6 days till I see him again, but I just couldn't ask him to visit me everyday cause he still has school. I'll be missing him again.... But he just hugged me and said he'd be back. I then suddenly  noticed a cut on his hand though. I wanted to ask him about it but he already said goodbye. I hope P is taking care of himself...

Off's pov
Phew, I was glad that Gun is doing well today. Although he looked so sad when he mentioned about his father. Damn him. Just don't let me see him in person or else I would really punch him on the face..

But that's not important for now. I was relieved though that Gun didn't notice the cuts on my hand. However if he did notice it and ask me, I have no choice but to lie. I mean I couldn't possibly tell him that I suddenly felt dizzy while working on my part time job and fell and got cut on my arm and hand. My manager said I was overworking myself. And he made a decision to fire me so that I could focus more on my studies. I'm healthy for heaven's sake, it's just that Ive been saving   money that's why I have to lessen my expenses on food. But damn it. Without my part time job, how can I give money for Gun's treatment.

Then I decided to ask people for help. So I called my sister first.

Am: oie Jhumpol, good thing you called me. How's it Goin?

Off: P.. Ahmmmmm can I ask for money? I'll pay you this summer maybe I promise.

Am: the allowance is not enough boy? How much?

Off: a couple of bucks, I promise I'll pay you.

Am: oiee.. Tell me the truth. You're not on drugs are you?

Off: the heck of course not

Am: then what's with the big amount? You're not eloping with Gun right?

Off: no. Not now.. I mean.... That's not the reason.

Am: you know I'm not gonna lend you if you're not gonna tell me the reason.

Off: okay fine. Gun is in the hospital. I need money for his treatment

Am: WHAT? Jhumpol. You're just Gun's boyfriend okay. You're not his husband. And besides the expenses is not your concern unless you did something to him.

Off: I didn't do anything stupid to him. He's....  I want to help him.

Am: he has a family right? If you really want to help him, visiting him would be enough. And also just to remind you, you will be graduating soon. Finish your requirements and when you can find a job then that's the time you can help your boyfriend with all the expenses okay?

Off: that's... still far.... He might... He might not be able make it by that time...

Am: what did you say?.. Hey jhum...

Off: if you're not gonna help me then fine..

Am: wait.... Jhum....

I ended the call. I know she can't help me. So stupid to ask for help from my family. I mean, they won't possibly understand... I love Gun so much.... And I don't want him to suffer anymore..  Of course they won't understand how I feel..

Next few days
I was going home after my internship. Our research group leader then texted me to get our published research in the store. But on the bright side. At least our research is 90% finished, it will lessen my burden and it will give me free time once it's done.

After getting it. I just then checked some of the stores maybe they're hiring for something or what. Then someone tapped me on the shoulder. I was shocked to see the person I haven't seen for so long..

Jane: Off. Good to see you here...

TBC