What is Home

Chapter Nineteen

We ate dinner as the six of us and it felt nice to have a family like I should have had my whole life. The original Leighton three got to know the new Bakers that joined the family. I sat in silence as I let the twins talk and listen. They were slowly becoming more comfortable in their new home. They knew here, that no one was going to be hurt. No matter what, sleeping and being here, would always be better than what they had in the past.

After dinner I baked with Luca and Lucy in the kitchen. We made way more cookies than we should have, but we were bonding. We were getting to do the things that we always wish we could have done growing up. We just knew that we didn't have the money to do so and our parents would have never allowed it. Us kids weren't allowed to have any type of fun. Baking, to our biological parents, was looked at as us trying to have fun.

I looked up from the mixer while it combined all the ingredients and saw our new mom watching us bond together with smiles spread across our faces. Anyone who could see her face would be able to know that she was happy with the decision she made to foster all of us, and hopefully one day adopt us.

By the time we finished baking the hundred or so cookies we made, the kitchen was a disaster. Flour could be found from one end of the kitchen to the other. We couldn't help ourselves when it came to flour fights. We, ourselves, were covered in all the different ingredients as well. As long as we were enjoying ourselves our parents didn't care. They just wanted us to be enjoying ourselves, something we weren't allowed to do in our past.

I sent Luca and Lucy up to their rooms as the final batch of cookies were placed into the oven. I cleaned up the mess we had created while I waited to take the cookies out of the oven. The timer went off and I pulled the final batch from the oven placing them onto the cooling rack. I finished cleaning up our mess and decided it was time to do the same to me.

For the first time all day I was able to be alone. It was something I needed to center myself again. I had begun to like having company for most of the day and then getting to have time for myself. It wasn't like it was even time for myself I normally spent that time doing homework. But it was still time to just be instead of having to worry about seven-hundred other things. In my alone time, I only had to focus on one thing, which was either my homework or myself.

Before I headed off to bed for the night I made my way back to the kitchen to pack up Grayson's cookies into a container to give to him the next day at school. I stopped by Luca and Lucy's room to tell them goodnight before I settled myself in bed for the night.

It felt weird not seeing my Charlee girl on my phone before I headed off to bed. It left me feeling a little empty inside. I was really becoming attached to Grayson like I was with Pierce. I needed the both of them to feel whole. I knew that with the both of them, I wouldn't go a day feeling alone. No matter what, I would always have someone to listen to me. They were both a huge part of my support system. The therapist I spoke to, or I guess more avoided speaking to, always told me how important building a group of people around me was. I might not have participated in any activity in the group home but I was always listening and learning.

The next morning, I woke up to find both Luca and Lucy laying in my bed with me. I had a feeling that this was going to end up being a normal occurrence. The nightmares become overwhelming. The twins would always feel the safest with me around. I didn't wake them as I got out of bed to get ready for school. I knew the feeling they were going through of feeling uncomfortable and alone, not getting much sleep. They deserved to sleep as long as they possibly could. I knew that back in our biological parent's home they definitely weren't getting a lot of sleep. They needed all the rest they could get.

I kissed both of their heads before I left my room, shutting my door quietly behind me. I wasn't very hungry so I didn't join the family in eating breakfast, but I did sit with everyone as they ate. I fiddled with the lid of the cookies I was giving Grayson, popping the edge open and closed, while I waited for Reece to finish up to take us to school.

Not too long after sitting down at the table we were out the door headed back to school. I hadn't spoken much with Reece since the day before. I just wanted to catch up during the ride on everything that happened at practice. I mostly wanted to know how both, Pierce and Grayson, were acting at practice.

"Grayson had it out for Pierce all practice. I honestly have never seen Grayson more aggressive on the field in my life. I have played ball with him since we were little, so that is saying a lot. Football may be his passion, but he has never played in the way he did yesterday. And there was no doubt that he was putting that aggression to Pierce. I don't know what his issue was."

I explained to Reece what Grayson had witnessed in the hall and how that was probably the issue. It all clicked to him and he knew that I was fully the reason. Apparently, Grayson was always the one being walked over and he wasn't going to let it happen again.

Grayson was late to school again and I assumed it was so he didn't have to have one second alone with me. He was doing everything in his power to avoid me. Even if it meant skipping first period. I knew that for him to get to second period he had to walk past my locker. There was no other way for him to avoid me, so I sat waiting at my locker for him to walk by.

His eyes stared at me the moment he turned onto the wing where my locker was. His eyes didn't break away from me even when I caught him staring. I walked out in front of him to get him to stop his quick pace to try and get by me. He tried to step to either side of me to get around but I wouldn't let him.

"Grayson, let me talk please." His face grew with anger the longer I kept him trapped in the hall.

"Charlee what in the world aren't you understanding? Has being hit by your father really made you that stupid?" His harsh words cut deep. Deeper than any cut my father placed upon my skin. I shoved the cookies I made him into his chest.

"Fuck you." I let out of my mouth a lot louder than I planned to. Tears formed instantly in my eyes. No matter how hard I tried to hold them back, they still fell. Out of all the people, I never expected words like that to leave Grayson's mouth. His face read of no remorse for his words.

No matter the pain I caused him, I didn't deserve any of this at all. What he said was way out of line. I wanted nothing to do with him ever again. The issue was though, that he was best friends with my brother and there was no way for me to get away from him. I had to sit just feet away from him when lunch rolled around. I contemplated just hiding myself away in the bathroom again, but I didn't need my brother worrying all over again.

I pulled myself together by the time Reece entered the classroom. All the tears had been wiped away. He didn't question anything at all. That meant that I had successfully hidden the fact that I had just been brutally stabbed in the heart just a few minutes before.