Sixth Rhythm
Stupid
IT'S BEEN days since the last time I saw my mom. Hindi pa kami nakakapag-usap ulit tungkol sa sinabi niya na lilipat na raw kami ng bahay. I just hope she'll change her mind because I don't really want to leave this house. I can let her go if that's what she wants but don't bother dragging me into that house. Ayaw ko talaga ro'n.
I can never live with strangers under the same roof.
Pinagmasdan ko ang makalat kong kwarto na hindi ko pa rin nalilinis simula noong nakaraan. I have all the time to clean this mess but I ended up overthinking for the past days and nights.
Can I get any better?
Minsan napapaisip tuloy ako kung ano ba talaga ang kailangan ko para maging maayos ang aking pag-iisip. Nagsimula lang naman 'to noong nagiging madalas na ang pag-aaway nina Mama at Papa. They're always fighting to the point that they're already affecting me. Si Papa ang madalas na nauunang humingi ng tawad, habang si Mama naman ay magmamatigas pa rin kahit na anong mangyari.
Lumabas ako ng aking silid para magtungo sa kusina. I'm already starving and I hope that I can find some food in the fridge. Ang tanging laman ng fridge ay tubig, bukod pa roon ay wala na. Maybe I'll just stick with the easy open can that I have here.
Habang binubuksan ko ang delata ay bahagya akong nabigla sa pagsulpot ni Mama. Ganoon ba ako kalutang at hindi ko man lang narinig ang pagbukas ng pinto?
"What are you doing?" she asked as she raised her brows while looking at me.
Hindi ako nakasagot. Bumaba lang ang tingin ko sa delatang hawak ko bago ko ulit siya tinapunan ng tingin.
"Hindi ba't sinabi kong mag-impake ka na? Anong ginagawa mo riyan, Rhy?!"
"It's been days since you've said that, Ma. Ang akala ko ay hindi na tuloy-" naputol ang aking sasabihin dahil sa hitsurang pinakita niya.
Her face is gloomy again, the same face that she always do every time I talked back. Sa tagal kong nakasama si Mama ay kabisado ko na ang bawat emosyon at hitsurang ipinapakita niya sa akin. Bihira siyang ngumiti kapag ako ang kasama niya at madalas din siyang galit at nakasimangot.
Ganoon na siya kahit pa noong bata ako, lalo na kapag maraming pasalubong na dala para sa akin si Papa. Madalas ay naiinis siya at iyon ang hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit. She wants my father's attention only for herself. But most of their arguments are mainly because of my mom's insecurities. Due to my father's job as a musician, he had to work with some people from the showbiz industry. Ang iilan doon ay mga babae kaya nagagalit si Mama, aniya'y nagtataksil daw si Papa sa kaniya.
Despite of my father's bad decisions in life, I can assure anyone that he is not a cheater. Kahit isang beses ay hindi niya iyon ginawa. He's a very loyal and faithful man. He has no reason to cheat at all.
If there's a cheater here, that would be my mother. I won't justify her actions that are not valid at all. She felt and saw something in Tito Rancio that's why she chose to ruined her marriage- our family.
"Pack your freaking things, Rhythm! Hindi pa ba sapat 'yong ilang araw na binigay ko sa'yo para makapag-impake? May mahirap ba sa ipinapagawa ko, ha?" irita niyang sabi sa akin.
"Pero-" I wasn't able to complete my sentence because of what she did. Kinuha lang naman niya ang hawak kong delata at walang sabing ibinuhos iyon sa akin.
"Maligo ka na rin at mag-impake! Huwag mo akong paghihintayin at baka mag-init na naman ako!" huling sabi niya bago pumunta sa sala.
Wala sa sarili akong lumakad patungo sa aking silid para makapag-ayos na. Amoy sardinas na ako ngayon at binabalot ng lansa ang aking pang-amoy. Ang daming ibang taong nagugutom dahil walang makain pero itong nanay ko ay nakuha pang magsayang!
BINABASA MO ANG
Rhythm of Life (Varduzco Series #1)
Narrativa generaleVarduzco (1/6) There is rhythm even in silence. Rhythm Vita Elvacion is a girl who only wants a complete family ever since she was a kid. She never asked for anything aside from the love and affection of her own mother, and her dream is to become a...