I choose me.

Part 32: That's impossible

(Friday 2/8)

"What in the fuck?" She screeched, leaning up and looking over the doctor's office gown tented out over her knees.

"Your IUD, it came out of it's place and it's lodged in your vaginal wall." The doctor said with a concerned look, then she pushed her fingers up a little further.

"I've had these since I was fourteen, I get them replaced when I'm supposed to, this has never happened." Hearing she had a piece of copper wedged in her vagina gave her all sorts of Frankenstein like images in her head—she knew she was on edge because she was tired, Crawford had been gone nearly two weeks and only had more business piling up.

"I'm going to remove it okay? This might hurt a little bit." Olivia lay her head back down.

"You'll put in a new one right?"

The doctor hesitated, "Your body needs to heal from this, it's inflamed and I need to check some things out, okay I'm going in." She winced as the doctor reached in with tweezers that looked like they were on steroids. "Okay, a little pull." She grabbed the edge of the exam table, it felt like an acrylic nail you were trying to peel off. "There we go." she head a tiny pop and a 'tink' when the doctor put it in a stainless steel bowl and then wheeled another cart over and grabbed a white wand. "I'm going to to do an internal ultra sound." She said, it only took a second and she sat straight up.

"WHY? WHAT? What's the need for that." She tried to pull her legs out of the stir-ups, the doctor was taken aback by her reaction.

"Please calm down, because it hasn't been properly in place, pregnancy can occur, I feel the uterus is slightly enlarged from when I palpitated your stomach, since we are already here, an internal ultrasound can either confirm that, or show us nothing." She said too calmly. Hot panic rose up in her chest, then neck and into her face, she pressed her hand over her mouth, "Okay." This was impossible, pregnancy? No! She winced again when the doctor slid the wand in and rotated it. She refused to look at the screen and kept her eyes squeezed tightly shut.

"Olivia."

"What?"

"Look at the monitor." She opened her eyes and looked at the black and gray fuzzy screen, in the middle, there was a visible black bubble and a tiny white dot. Her throat closed up and fear seized her.

"I'd say four to six weeks." The doctor pulled it out and Olivia sat up, in an absolute frenzy.

"You have to take it out now!" She stood and the doctor washed her hands.

"Why don't you take a day for two and think—" She grabbed her clip board off of the sterile white counter.

"NO, no thinking, take it out now." Olivia did not want to think about anything, she didn't want to think about her and Crawford's child growing inside of her. She could have sworn the walls all shimmered and waved around her.

"I can't just give you an abortion right now." The doctor grabbed the blood pressure cuff off of the wall.

"I can't have a baby—schedule me in now."

"There are options dear, is the child's father around?"

Olivia fought with a tornado of emotions while the cuff tightened around her arm.

"I've had the IUD to prevent his—I've tried to get sterilized since I was eighteen, but no one would do it. It's hot in here, are you hot?" She yanked at the neckline of the gown she'd changed into.

"Your blood pressure is dangerously high right now, take some deep breaths."

Olivia sucked in air, trying not to go totally crazy, eventually her vision cleared and her temperature lowered.