DON'T LET ME GO

Chapter 18

10 minutes went by and we're still in bed, gazing into eachother in silence. I was coming up with ways to magically transport Carmen out of the bedroom without any of the staff seeing her, specially Edward. I think he had enough of my "brat crisis" as he called it last time we argued over my so called scandals.

Carmen suddenly jumped off the bed and while dressing herself with her back to me asked:

- should i hide here or jump out the balcony?
- is that morning sarcasm?

She didnt reply as if thinking of what to say, and waited.
A knock on the door again....

- EDWARD I SAID GO THE FUCK AWAYYYY

Aparently i have no authority over whoever knocked my door because they just ignored my shouting and helped themselves inside my room..

Three of us standing there in shock, well to be more acurate they are standing, i'm still laying naked wraped in sheets on the bed. Edward is looking at me, Carmen is looking at me i think at that moment i felt like the 7 billion souls roaming the earth were looking at me and i froze, i didnt know what to do. Edward was the first to break the awkward silence, he throw his hands in the air and as they were on the way to land on top of his head on a very theatrically dramatic way he shouted:

-WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS JENNIFER?
- geez Edy, we had a party what's wrong?

Obviously that was a very hopeless attempt to camouflage the situation in hand. Carmen was just looking at me while ziping her dress.

- can you explain what this girl is doing half dressed in your bedroom while you're naked in bed?
-I told you we had a party what the fuck...

I could tell Carmen was expecting another type of explanation, she picked her shoes of off the floor and started walking towards the door. I jumped off the bed racing to reach for her before she leaves at the same time Edy still in disbelieve just shouted my name "JENNYYYYYYY".

As i reached for her hand, she pulled away, i am now standing between her and the door wraped in my sheets whispering:

- Please dont go. Give me a second please!
- Tell him
-Carmen please
- i can't fight for a maybe jenny...

She walked right pass me and as she did i whispered again

-you said you're forever mine!

I think she didnt hear that last part, or maybe she ignored it, my bet is on the second probability.
I looked back at Edward, i wanted to kick his stupid ass for puting me in such position but i had no force, i just asked him to close the door behind him as i crawled back to bed.

It's been weeks since that faitful morning, Edward and i never spoke about it and Carmen simply vanished from the face of earth. I kept sending her messages that she never read, calling her people who never gave me one clear answer as of where she is or how to find her.
After multiple attemps, and hopeless days of waiting, Ezzy my sweet assistant finally found the courage to adress my broken heart ghost like existence and try to talk me back into life.

- Darling why are you torturing yourself? Make a choice you either go for it and ignore everything else in your life or focus on yourself and let it go.
- i cant make that choice.
- eventually you have to, the girl is gone! Maybe it's for the best. Come on let's go out have fun meet people, come on it'll do you good....