My Love

Flat Pillows and Hospital Beds

Luke was my younger brother not my three year old brother my 13 year old brother. He had been sent off to some boarding school because he wanted to I think. Well apparently something happened while he was over there. I was worried about him but I wasn't because I knew Luke could take care of himself.

I had begun to daze off but the sound of Logan's breathing kinda freaked me out. I mean it was like quick breaths like he couldn't breathe. Then all of a sudden he began to daze off. Then his eyes completely shut, I knew what was gunna happen next. I was embraced for it, for this, I was ready for the pain.

I felt the car come to a sudden stop, glass flew at my face. After a few seconds my face stung. I looked to the drivers seat to see a somehow untouched Logan look up. He gasped at the sight of me. After seeing his face everything went black, the whole world of color had slowly faded out on me. Was this my end, the end, was I dead?

"Dear beloved we gather hear today in memory of Addison Matthews, a beautiful girl one of our friends and fam-" ha you thought. No it had been sometime and I hadn't woken up I heard the sobs of Logan and Jack my dad and Maria. Luke was in a coma and so was I. My dad would cry for hours having to be split between his daughter and son, having to stay with one for a bit and the other for a bit. Maria would speak of my father's pain when she was alone with me and Logan. Jack left my side quiet a few times to look after Luke. While Logan would never leave me alone not even for a second. He would ask his mom bring his guitar and sing to me for hours and they are my favorite songs.

After three weeks or four weeks had passed I was tired of this. I hated the color black. I hated not being able to hold Logan's hand and squeeze it when I got scared (which was all the time now), I hated not being able to say 'I love you' back to him, I hated not being able to hug him, and most of all I hated to being able to see his beautiful smile and only hear his terrible sobs. I hated being the reason for his tears. I wanted to slap him for being sad and caring so much.

After awhile Jack walked in and began whispering to Logan, "you need to go home and sleep, eat, bathe, check on your family and everything else." He sighed, "b-b-but I can't l-leave her alone." I knew he was going to cry because his voice was cracking. He cleared his throat.

I opened my eyes to see color for the first time in weeks, or so I thought. I quickly threw the memory away this is the room where the fight between mom and dad happened. I wanted to cry at the thought of the memory but I couldn't. That memory had haunted me for years. Logan had finally walked back in after what felt like forever him and Jack made a deal that once a day for 1 hour that Logan would leave and Jack would stay and watch me. Logan wasn't happy but he needed sleep.

Jack left and Logan came to take the 'ugly sky blue chair' (or so Logan said) by my bed. He grabbed my hand and put it to his face. He put my hand to his cheek and I felt a tear run down his cheek onto my hand and, well I woke up.....oh no I wish I did. To bad this isn't some Disney story where one person cries and they other wakes up from a deep-death like-slumber. I wanted to wake up but from what the doctors were saying "I don't have the strength."

One month and a week had passed by, both Luke and I had still been in comas. Luke was beginning to slowly die, from what dad would say. They said I was getting better but I didn't feel any better, to be honest I didn't feel anything.

Then one day I got great news, Luke woke up. He was going to be stable. I was happy for him but now it was my turn. This was my only chance to show that I still some fight in me. So on November 26 I was going to pull myself out of this.